tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38910073682599767412024-03-14T03:42:51.382-06:00BINKSFAMILYBLOG.COMKim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-87861127690028634772011-09-08T14:47:00.001-06:002011-09-08T15:31:52.998-06:00Bitter-Sweet ....<div style="text-align: center;">Where do I even begin!? It has obviously been forever since I last shared anything on my blog- and to be perfectly honest, I don't intentionally "not" write, but it does strike a lot of really hard emotions that are sometimes better to keep tucked away until I am ready to face them head on...and, I guess today must be one of those days. :) </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijhsOnAlgLSpL1iJPDl5YruC7ErHB1Pc3iBEu2Fbnp_ALRPD1qxCpRO652bmZILTxyXMZcuxaLSaSvCX-negRjnlXWLnQG8KA1VgYaD1JVhU6bjlZwAX7kUHoatRxPPlyGSIqC2MuyX_V3/s1600/100_3253.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijhsOnAlgLSpL1iJPDl5YruC7ErHB1Pc3iBEu2Fbnp_ALRPD1qxCpRO652bmZILTxyXMZcuxaLSaSvCX-negRjnlXWLnQG8KA1VgYaD1JVhU6bjlZwAX7kUHoatRxPPlyGSIqC2MuyX_V3/s320/100_3253.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">September 8, 2004- </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Today my sweet Kamberlie would be turning 7 years old! Can you even imagine- because I sure can't! To picture Kamberlie as 7 years old is next to impossible for me. I look at all the darling little girls that live by us and try to imagine what she would look like, but I just can't- she will forever by my little 3 year old. :) </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">So, I have kind of struggled with trying to put into words all the thoughts that have been running through my head the past several days... Sometimes I feel like my blog is just so sappy, but then again (as I have said several times before) this blog is for me and for my dealing with life as it is thrown at me... so I apologize in advance. :) </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">I keep going back to the day Kambrie was born and all the excitement and anticipation leading up to the day when I could finally welcome my sweet baby girl in our home! I was beyond ecstatic! She was my tiny 5 lb.10 oz. baby and she was beyond perfect! </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Had I known her life here on earth would be so short would I have done things differently? ...tough question... The first thought that pops into my head is "probably" , but in all actuality I would really hope not- I mean of course there are things I regret doing or in some instances not doing- but I can truly say I did my best! I loved my babies more than anything else in this world- and I would hope that they knew and felt that!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Fast forwarding a few years later- now Kamberlie is 3, and she was such a joy! Her little personality was so funny! She always looked so girly, but really was so tough. She was my little "tom boy" and I loved it! I was so incredibly proud of her! :) I remember the night before she passed away she wanted to be right by my side. I remember her rolling off of the mattress we were laying on and scooping her little body up and just holding her tight for the rest of the night. I LOVE that I have that memory... She wasn't one that liked to cuddle or ever let anyone really hold her - she was like that from day one- so to be able to just love her was such a gift. Little did I know that it would be the only time... </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">-SO-</div><div style="text-align: center;">What exactly do we do for her birthday... well- the first year she was gone (her 4th birthday) we still had a family party and had all the aunts and uncles and grandmas and grandpas over for cake and ice cream... but we have kind of gotten away from that now and just make it a special day for our little family. We go to the cemetery where we take pink balloons (her favorite) and each of us tells a story or a special memory we have of Kamberlie and then we let the balloon go- my boys LOVE it! In fact they look so forward to her birthday every year. Then, we are gong to come home and the kids will all get a white cake donut with colorful sprinkles (again, Kambrie's favorite ) and then we usually watch her little video that we played at her funeral and after all our tears and random questions from the boys we call it a night- Gosh, sounds depressing- but it really isn't. It is actually really, really neat. I love that we take the time to celebrate her life as small and simple as it was. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Thanks to my amazing little sister Nicole- this is Kamberlies video... Enjoy. :)</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/fVVNpxsmVh4?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">Happy Birthday baby girl- oh how I love and miss every single thing about you! </div><div style="text-align: center;">4 years down... just a lifetime left to go...</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-67382596249155286442011-06-29T20:32:00.001-06:002011-06-29T20:34:14.552-06:00Just a little something...I know it has been forever, and I have had so much that I have wanted to share.... but for now- this video touched my heart today! Something I really needed to hear . ( well- today, and yesterday, and the day before, and possibly the day before that....:) ) I love, LOVE it!<br />
Enjoy. xoxo<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/8nczw6xHJ0I?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-74048222105103971482011-01-02T18:59:00.004-07:002011-01-05T16:33:55.812-07:00Life is AMAZING... simple as that...Thursday, December 23<br />
<br />
It is 7:48AM and so far today has been truly incredible! Many people know I am a fitness instructor- and today is just one more of those days that makes me realize just how much I love what I do. Today, things have, once again, been put into proper perspective. I am constantly saying to my classes " Why do I have you do do 24 set of stairs.... why are we 15 minutes into a spinning class and completely wasted....why do I make you do this or that......Why? Because we CAN!" 4 months ago another instructor-and friend, I work with, Lisa Hardy, was hit by a suburban while riding her rode bike training for an upcoming race.... She was thrown 30 feet backward landing on the road, life-flighted, and lived to be an incredible inspiration to me, and many others. The sign outside of her room in the ICU read D-... she was, literally, on the edge of death. Well, today she came back to teach.... and she was amazing!<br />
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It is now Sunday, January 2nd...I wrote this post about a week and a half ago, but hadn't yet published it because I felt like there was more I needed to say...<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Now that it is officially a "New Year", I am SO looking forward to it! I have done quite a bit of reflecting on the past year and.I have to admit...it definitely wasn't my best year- but nowhere near my worst either. I struggled a lot the past year in many areas of my life..... I feel like I am constantly sifting through, trying to come up with some big "plan" to make things different, to make things better.... to let my fairytale life return. And we all know it just doesn't work that way.</div><div><br />
</div>The first day Lisa came back to teach, one thing she said, that made a huge impact on me was, "It was my attitude and determination that got me back here" I love that. She had to work extremely hard to even be able to walk, and yet she was out there jogging, doing stairs and planning for her next marathon!! (Not to mention 4 months after nearly being killed!) Talk about dedication!<br />
<br />
Why is it that when things are tough, I find myself automatically turning toward the negatives of the situation, rather than the positives? I HATE that about myself. It is far too easy for me to think I can do it all on my own when I already know that I can't- so then why do I do it? Why is it so hard for me to completely turn my whole trust over to my Father in Heaven- knowing that he knows best, that this test is not more than a mere moment..... ? And yet, how much do we take for granted? Pretty much everything...Our spouse, our children, our families, our home, our jobs...our faith, our friendships, our health..... do we really realize all that we have been blessed with? <br />
<br />
Last month I was in the temple and a lady came and sat next to me.... out of nowhere really, there were many empty seats, she opened up her scriptures and turned right to this verse and told me I should read this... and then she walked away.<br />
<span class="verse" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 5px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 22px;">Isaiah 41:10</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;">¶</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"><sup class="studyNoteMarker" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 10px; line-height: 1; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; vertical-align: super;">a</sup></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"><a class="footnote" href="http://lds.org/scriptures/ot/isa/41.10?lang=eng#" id="footnote11" rel="/scriptures/chapter/footnote/default.xqy?volumeUri=ot&bookUri=isa&chapterUri=41&noteID=10a&lang=eng" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; color: #486fae; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">Fear</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;">thou not; for I</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"><span class="clarityWord" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 16px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">am</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;">with thee: be not dismayed; for I</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"><span class="clarityWord" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; font-size: 16px; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; outline-color: initial; outline-style: initial; outline-width: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">am </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;">thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #2f393a; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 22px;"></span>Let me just tell you how much I needed to hear this... This scripture was exactly what I needed at that exact moment in my life-<br />
<br />
Along with many other instances over the past year, it has made me realize-once again... that I am ready to move forward. I am ready to really start living and loving my life, because before I know it- it will all be gone, and what a waste it would be to let it all just slip away. I never used to struggle with any of this, things always came so matter-of-fact and quite easy ..But now that has all changed, and because of that- it is the time to begin living, loving, trusting, believing, and realizing my true potential....I am ready- All it takes is the right attitude and little bit of determination.... right?<br />
<br />
Life is AMAZING.....simple as that....let's try not to take one single moment for granted.....Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-21044173345792345682010-09-29T14:06:00.002-06:002010-10-01T08:59:53.339-06:00This is how I spent last Saturday.... Just forewarning you there are LOTS of pictures to follow...<br />
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It honestly makes me giddy even thinking about it. :)<br />
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Okay so seriously- THE FUNNEST RACE EVER! I have definitely run before. In fact I would feel pretty comfortable saying that I have run, and run, and run- but NEVER like this. Never in the mud, or on a 10k trail course full of crazy obstacles.<br />
<br />
It just happened to be a whim that I was able to run this race- A super fun group of girls from the gym had been planning on running this race for quite a while- but about a week prior to the race one of their team members (cute Melissa) had an injury and knowing Melissa, the only reason why she didn't go ahead and run it anyway was because she needed to take it easy before running the St. George Marathon the next Saturday!! :) ( She is an animal) So, I was invited- and to tell you the truth, quite hesitant on running not knowing at all what to expect.<br />
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<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">The weather was perfect. The company was even better. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVatFOAq5ZsS74CzLm0EJQVcCPwqqak0If_4TTKiDwJXErhEX6wbm9retzrEOVTTtbvV4Wghk4EEqKt3L_-G0yW0nbJUQeEYzN1fARj_F66usq7QDYB83RRvy_Roag8ZENlCpwQSZwVOKu/s1600/IMG_1855.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVatFOAq5ZsS74CzLm0EJQVcCPwqqak0If_4TTKiDwJXErhEX6wbm9retzrEOVTTtbvV4Wghk4EEqKt3L_-G0yW0nbJUQeEYzN1fARj_F66usq7QDYB83RRvy_Roag8ZENlCpwQSZwVOKu/s320/IMG_1855.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ana, Cari, Ree, Me, Lisa</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqx61PBJe9NGWOUceDfuuS6vWfqH-jsdm9WPGMgFaPYLnh52yB4XG8yceN6qgQGhX9cSU5q3U6xV_5K7MuqTRSNhS3m3KDgd0usy0nV50m24tphtFBZ7kLVBSa9me6d5agm8gjrfIwAPML/s1600/IMG_1874.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqx61PBJe9NGWOUceDfuuS6vWfqH-jsdm9WPGMgFaPYLnh52yB4XG8yceN6qgQGhX9cSU5q3U6xV_5K7MuqTRSNhS3m3KDgd0usy0nV50m24tphtFBZ7kLVBSa9me6d5agm8gjrfIwAPML/s320/IMG_1874.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Running</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA3pn-mezUgiRcZz0baEQH6ZcVmtVTM3I4A4rUYTdvbjFQws6Lnk9rs0XQeojElR_B45Cu3VweRlN1GuapLpNGd9Ksp1jsLBAw0M8Hu3qqueDxdB9N2WtYiFoeEhgHv6UxJjfEQBHHE3_3/s1600/IMG_1890.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA3pn-mezUgiRcZz0baEQH6ZcVmtVTM3I4A4rUYTdvbjFQws6Lnk9rs0XQeojElR_B45Cu3VweRlN1GuapLpNGd9Ksp1jsLBAw0M8Hu3qqueDxdB9N2WtYiFoeEhgHv6UxJjfEQBHHE3_3/s320/IMG_1890.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cheering on the girls with the "polygamy brother"</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQrpT-UWvtRW-KsrhuZKzBhRDjrT-6k64CbCildQTFeA4euWrD1tgtZZoFsxEChr6tzTwepBlqpbc-kK3HrXzp668D0sVVPDzxv5UDbCdZtvHiEkcmZPqqdEvsdR6JQVG-ZWeyvTsNFFwE/s1600/IMG_1950.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQrpT-UWvtRW-KsrhuZKzBhRDjrT-6k64CbCildQTFeA4euWrD1tgtZZoFsxEChr6tzTwepBlqpbc-kK3HrXzp668D0sVVPDzxv5UDbCdZtvHiEkcmZPqqdEvsdR6JQVG-ZWeyvTsNFFwE/s320/IMG_1950.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pretty positive this guys wife didn't like us so much.<br />
note: his shirt says "Polygamy is exhausting" pretty funny.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8WTd_gQOzAVqZojJI5KBvb79NKGaVsf-kpbOPPEiOkATxiCxjd6WzE49L5X7nNoJetX1dvvZkT_Bz7qZksBNjuOWTcYd2Dm1hKjwiMl49uTGJ-_yEILAF_Z4DKRISLeEqPwig7Xb9sgCf/s1600/IMG_1887.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8WTd_gQOzAVqZojJI5KBvb79NKGaVsf-kpbOPPEiOkATxiCxjd6WzE49L5X7nNoJetX1dvvZkT_Bz7qZksBNjuOWTcYd2Dm1hKjwiMl49uTGJ-_yEILAF_Z4DKRISLeEqPwig7Xb9sgCf/s320/IMG_1887.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">...not quite sure what was going on here :)</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd7lK4hN4Mn_TM6zL1mV99mV38ZZ0iIWtUjREmRnZ2R8XQ_da8ljpkFqGJ7z7XaPxF81AIi5yjAHuzsKhsq8b47scMycDxEqBfO4FkOP3yhNthlUQZlpQ4sX9_9MsfQhLK2RGR1TazNGU0/s1600/IMG_1849.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd7lK4hN4Mn_TM6zL1mV99mV38ZZ0iIWtUjREmRnZ2R8XQ_da8ljpkFqGJ7z7XaPxF81AIi5yjAHuzsKhsq8b47scMycDxEqBfO4FkOP3yhNthlUQZlpQ4sX9_9MsfQhLK2RGR1TazNGU0/s320/IMG_1849.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Running</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB0doIKJl5e31VaCUG-SCLHEmSgtgu6J8WVAciI_a8AbzI4Tf6AaicjSOpeoGGW37X_DRblDGAlx2vNoFtY9xH2ZTWDOhA1Y7lsY4HloDaU7DT16oC49maUeaT_wq67LEBxjcG5tlqPN95/s1600/IMG_1871.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB0doIKJl5e31VaCUG-SCLHEmSgtgu6J8WVAciI_a8AbzI4Tf6AaicjSOpeoGGW37X_DRblDGAlx2vNoFtY9xH2ZTWDOhA1Y7lsY4HloDaU7DT16oC49maUeaT_wq67LEBxjcG5tlqPN95/s320/IMG_1871.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">....more running.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgelZcntPAyBBjQhcWmOrWCWI-0XXoQmTfSB5O2wz1YZ5I2Li8QH1Wy87xg8qO8WUF7wTCAzRD47NKuMyM_BGy-SxR4HRA3tjYPIgmmysoOBPS6n975pNQBhn5kd8qdH2MiR1fc4MAaIMBg/s1600/62070_476695432183_697452183_7187846_7421932_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgelZcntPAyBBjQhcWmOrWCWI-0XXoQmTfSB5O2wz1YZ5I2Li8QH1Wy87xg8qO8WUF7wTCAzRD47NKuMyM_BGy-SxR4HRA3tjYPIgmmysoOBPS6n975pNQBhn5kd8qdH2MiR1fc4MAaIMBg/s320/62070_476695432183_697452183_7187846_7421932_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Stop and pose.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzd3F-obdIgVFf6WGrBm7LboqgYv_usQDMiYwwysEkmjIq6nLMMjGKkk2M3th65OvQzOnLLhCZ-rCQ0CdJLVyUy-ffiLl3ZNPwyPxqe4VB40l5DPIJRU3xxCXlKRPWwX82jz54PKIu2hnw/s1600/62376_476695577183_697452183_7187850_1764872_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzd3F-obdIgVFf6WGrBm7LboqgYv_usQDMiYwwysEkmjIq6nLMMjGKkk2M3th65OvQzOnLLhCZ-rCQ0CdJLVyUy-ffiLl3ZNPwyPxqe4VB40l5DPIJRU3xxCXlKRPWwX82jz54PKIu2hnw/s320/62376_476695577183_697452183_7187850_1764872_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Down the slide.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPVEqckmDJasq8tB7ljUd7FkK8zYuFInlfG31zCqBIH9FsLJRIpLhl83K_QM2qa_LjBYB7xG-ZTCjfmP89BqLyeXPUO9jmNrOOyl0XGQ2UhGijjZUjvmaTEl7gRTnfn2g0R5prGZp_ix8r/s1600/62376_476695602183_697452183_7187855_6907041_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPVEqckmDJasq8tB7ljUd7FkK8zYuFInlfG31zCqBIH9FsLJRIpLhl83K_QM2qa_LjBYB7xG-ZTCjfmP89BqLyeXPUO9jmNrOOyl0XGQ2UhGijjZUjvmaTEl7gRTnfn2g0R5prGZp_ix8r/s320/62376_476695602183_697452183_7187855_6907041_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Just after the slide</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQOoee-RNi5MfxegOzb_f-vhDxVHzKYXqVg7jjCbWbZ3XgYcWDPt9QqzMndA1eMZmjeZ1jEd2pwO6KwT13CtRwFu47VDjXh6tZCvWuHTFp922-VgCUvYjemK49VebZDfd2bpXy9lwz0wK5/s1600/62730_476705627183_697452183_7188087_1643267_s.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="201" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQOoee-RNi5MfxegOzb_f-vhDxVHzKYXqVg7jjCbWbZ3XgYcWDPt9QqzMndA1eMZmjeZ1jEd2pwO6KwT13CtRwFu47VDjXh6tZCvWuHTFp922-VgCUvYjemK49VebZDfd2bpXy9lwz0wK5/s320/62730_476705627183_697452183_7188087_1643267_s.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This picture is kind of blurry,<br />
but in case you are wondering- that just happens to<br />
be my arm before I started treading water!...gross.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpwwfnLRRtT0CrhYtx7bokRTlEgbWtBkeKWL0DoCtlOMj9RwgoqKbvxMQFF9UYDlbBFxUnbIvPaYEPXpD87P5wONJz-lC13d0WWbH5Z_jrjFZ9tvXoEZHS8stk0nVgNN9lMMKXdJdqnnc9/s1600/62730_476705617183_697452183_7188085_2853420_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpwwfnLRRtT0CrhYtx7bokRTlEgbWtBkeKWL0DoCtlOMj9RwgoqKbvxMQFF9UYDlbBFxUnbIvPaYEPXpD87P5wONJz-lC13d0WWbH5Z_jrjFZ9tvXoEZHS8stk0nVgNN9lMMKXdJdqnnc9/s320/62730_476705617183_697452183_7188085_2853420_n.jpg" width="312" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I swear to you- Throughout this course...<br />
all this mud- isn't JUST mud if you know what I'm saying! Gross!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 6px; padding-left: 6px; padding-right: 6px; padding-top: 6px; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqeUnkIeXu_XTObwglPA6AOjwO0TD7A_WhN8bZMRC3l6bhiV4ironVabKGx3LOGFmG-WKz9SLXEh8_yIAkWg7YIouzItfgq_PVwwvUXXCYGOctA4_iyXV5XJFEh9KbXKvWdF3H5HEX6f3w/s1600/IMG_1994.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqeUnkIeXu_XTObwglPA6AOjwO0TD7A_WhN8bZMRC3l6bhiV4ironVabKGx3LOGFmG-WKz9SLXEh8_yIAkWg7YIouzItfgq_PVwwvUXXCYGOctA4_iyXV5XJFEh9KbXKvWdF3H5HEX6f3w/s320/IMG_1994.JPG" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px; padding-top: 4px; text-align: center;">Cari, Me, Lisa, Ree, Ana<br />
Seriously, so dirty...and stinky.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuvl0pf-O6kuYMihfXSBSS98mzNCvJ-wpBO11y6cX1mxAm97OMaWkveacO0CZctE9NKbpi_JIPg2Y9bBCP3zz-Fei2AAgweDpTz9RVKqyA0mUN2RHERCaqnETbto2cE-3gWyO_GPPOzWSm/s1600/IMG_2012.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuvl0pf-O6kuYMihfXSBSS98mzNCvJ-wpBO11y6cX1mxAm97OMaWkveacO0CZctE9NKbpi_JIPg2Y9bBCP3zz-Fei2AAgweDpTz9RVKqyA0mUN2RHERCaqnETbto2cE-3gWyO_GPPOzWSm/s320/IMG_2012.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">All done. :) </td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7RVvAf-VXo5NxOmWHqeymeRCwTtPoSskdP7fkO6FknMuNX_nkAHavrrLAhqqveuZepeSngMNf_-khyphenhyphenI-DMQPZs0ryP9eva7kWm-ghVeqpZag8LNzQnbsrVj9zRxRP6ghQtzYciO05a96P/s1600/IMG_2018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7RVvAf-VXo5NxOmWHqeymeRCwTtPoSskdP7fkO6FknMuNX_nkAHavrrLAhqqveuZepeSngMNf_-khyphenhyphenI-DMQPZs0ryP9eva7kWm-ghVeqpZag8LNzQnbsrVj9zRxRP6ghQtzYciO05a96P/s320/IMG_2018.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh...don't worry they did provide showers-<br />
they just happened to be ICE COLD. Pretty much couldn't breathe.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
I am SO glad I ended up going- and definitely plan on doing it every year- pretty much forever! :)<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSKYSezx3lk4VWtl4gRSFdG6_A1kATlyA9lsiGCQh8AspAp17w_cooWE8qZJ-EfWSQ_mvKvHRDGGkcRSgOTMNAuwZPknjAZmrjAupnM3qfbqej-OhKnOdFEa60m_6gG1czqH1b7-oQ6TFK/s1600/IMG_2019.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSKYSezx3lk4VWtl4gRSFdG6_A1kATlyA9lsiGCQh8AspAp17w_cooWE8qZJ-EfWSQ_mvKvHRDGGkcRSgOTMNAuwZPknjAZmrjAupnM3qfbqej-OhKnOdFEa60m_6gG1czqH1b7-oQ6TFK/s320/IMG_2019.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ree, Me, Lisa, Tiburon, Cari, Ana, Melissa<br />
As clean as we were gonna get.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTuJ0mkSewY2G0D4cAuuS6Aq63fBRiO3PIZb328thmOU8ItMIOityGJzC8So9H0z64a_ZWx3R7q1QSacxl_8YodzPcv5bnosBbT1xHHiJp0Zy7k1i5YkFu4W9si1_O0zNLiR2VoMJElzFU/s1600/61672_452338800968_529580968_5788129_3686731_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTuJ0mkSewY2G0D4cAuuS6Aq63fBRiO3PIZb328thmOU8ItMIOityGJzC8So9H0z64a_ZWx3R7q1QSacxl_8YodzPcv5bnosBbT1xHHiJp0Zy7k1i5YkFu4W9si1_O0zNLiR2VoMJElzFU/s320/61672_452338800968_529580968_5788129_3686731_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One more pose with the race mascot...yep a pig.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>LOVED IT!!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwiQtgQ0m8e_7ESMaVn2OHt4Q-vhNcjNM6uUSlaZARPe1-5MTuH3pNs8kUTq2GQMeHSI2P58nF0H2ABm8JcYg' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
Thought I would add this video clip for your sheer entertainment. :) ENJOY.Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-73633050735009837672010-09-24T08:25:00.002-06:002010-09-24T08:30:08.619-06:00Remember When...<span id="goog_51541786"></span><span id="goog_51541787"></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5SGyopHOOFTbqkWCHHF-vety_l00I7Xw9_kpVpu-6wPiBs7EyW_wq5Z77gLIYuehpnhcgMi95W7U5m5fWFU4Rf0bbspls8HTQXcykeR9RUR6gHSbBR2XECpyw-xFfiETMgfPCEAxa5Jco/s1600/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+1+001.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5SGyopHOOFTbqkWCHHF-vety_l00I7Xw9_kpVpu-6wPiBs7EyW_wq5Z77gLIYuehpnhcgMi95W7U5m5fWFU4Rf0bbspls8HTQXcykeR9RUR6gHSbBR2XECpyw-xFfiETMgfPCEAxa5Jco/s400/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+1+001.bmp" width="400" /></a></div><br />
June 1997- Hawaii<br />
<br />
This is the "How Austin and I Met" story. Many people have heard this before, some people haven't . I wanted to write this down and record it for my kids... well and for me. :) So, here we go-<br />
<br />
1997 seems so incredibly long ago when you say it, but thinking back, it really doesn't seem that long ago. I had just graduated from Weber High School (Austin from Skyline High School). Me and some girlfriends had decided that Hawaii would be "the perfect" senior trip, so that is where we planned- and saved up- to go. It is kind of funny looking back because at the time I felt so old, but when I look at an 18 year old now, they seem so young. :) Anyway, ....<br />
<br />
Without going into all the details leading up to this point, let me just start by saying it wasn't a mere coincidence me meeting Austin. I truly believe that. I had been dating a pretty great guy for quite a while and we had broken things off just a few days before I was leaving. I really thought I was going to marry him and somehow make everything work out- (he was a non-member, which was a really hard situation for me because I wanted so badly to be married in the temple) So, I went on this trip with absolutely NO intentions of meeting anyone, but just having a great time with the girls. One thing I feel like I should mention, the night before I left was the first time in years I remember getting down on my knees and pleading with my Heavenly Father to help me find my way back to Him- and up to that point in my life I can honestly say I had never felt anything like that before- It was an amazing experience that I will never forget. At that moment I knew everything was going to work out and be ok..... but little did I know....I would meet my answer. :)<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPMLhuKmSSO0GWmJcwoTI7kUjIa4TWpNiHXKxN5iWHp19ciNnT1X4U5jceDoUdoiivrM9wVYjOVTqLuTxOR9u8dmJJztrzZ8HbiqKaff6DboSqv6zA0gvXsJNFgzR1Fq2IEkg4LqzYVPDd/s1600/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+3.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPMLhuKmSSO0GWmJcwoTI7kUjIa4TWpNiHXKxN5iWHp19ciNnT1X4U5jceDoUdoiivrM9wVYjOVTqLuTxOR9u8dmJJztrzZ8HbiqKaff6DboSqv6zA0gvXsJNFgzR1Fq2IEkg4LqzYVPDd/s400/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+3.bmp" width="400" /></a></div><br />
The next afternoon we arrived in Hawaii. Several of my friends had an earlier flight so they got there quite a bit earlier then me and two other girlfriends. I remember walking off the elevator onto the floor that we were staying being greeted by the other girls there and the first thing they said "Don't pay any attention to any of those guys down the hall- they are the biggest jerks!" I didn't think anything of it... I wasn't there for any of that. Somehow throughout the time we were there we started hanging out with "the jerks down the hall"- when one of my friends "called" for Austin -again, I didn't think anything of it. :) <br />
<br />
To tell you the truth, I am not exactly sure how it all happened or how it all worked out, other than I know I definitely noticed him. But it wasn't just that I thought he looked really good- he was just so much different then anyone else I had met before. Austin was an amazing example. I am not quite sure how he convinced about 20 of us to all catch a bus and head to church on Sunday- be he did, and it was a great experience. I remember watching him and the little things he would do made a huge impact on me. Austin was a leader and he didn't care what anyone else thought about him and I loved that. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiznfcu2iYxetp-QIa3_7opit-WA86bzXm2eHW2yKEKkHRDhyyThgrjXs9SZnWL0H7SdlRz76ij-7s3Flyi7Vm4kvVTWpmmYKXw73LbRXphCdMnRhIkdZs44KOpb0ajSuwDgmflcWbvC_fS/s1600/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+1+003.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiznfcu2iYxetp-QIa3_7opit-WA86bzXm2eHW2yKEKkHRDhyyThgrjXs9SZnWL0H7SdlRz76ij-7s3Flyi7Vm4kvVTWpmmYKXw73LbRXphCdMnRhIkdZs44KOpb0ajSuwDgmflcWbvC_fS/s400/Kim+&+Austin+Hawaii+1+003.bmp" width="400" /></a></div><br />
We ended up hanging out the rest of the time together (sorry Julie :) ) He was called a sell-out, and I know my friends weren't exactly thrilled that we were always together, but to make a long story very short- it all worked out, and I am SO grateful it did. We came home from Hawaii and dated for a year before he left to serve a mission in Brazil. I waited for him and when he came home we were married 2 months later. Now, ten incredible years and 5 beautiful children later I couldn't possibly dream of anything better!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-59746193680879877642010-09-14T12:08:00.003-06:002010-09-14T18:46:32.984-06:00Random...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGYemIFA3q5ZeSFuIV0pkTbCjdEghVI2AAXZa6RpYyhMpX2vhcW6AIohNFuWEgs5vNBgdyNENyAz5K0Ml5hNPvFKmnqEYulCHaVmGRycyQ5HEZDUDNOd56GRYy1EJAHAsinCFdh0nntq67/s1600/June+2010+Pictures+068.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGYemIFA3q5ZeSFuIV0pkTbCjdEghVI2AAXZa6RpYyhMpX2vhcW6AIohNFuWEgs5vNBgdyNENyAz5K0Ml5hNPvFKmnqEYulCHaVmGRycyQ5HEZDUDNOd56GRYy1EJAHAsinCFdh0nntq67/s320/June+2010+Pictures+068.jpg" /></a></div><br />
So, Monday night being "Family Night" we decided for part of it we would take the kids to a walkway overpass- I have NO idea what you call them- but you know what I mean, right? It is the walkway that goes over the road- Anyway, my kids have been asking me all summer if I would take them, and every time I thought it would be a good time, it never worked out ( crying, tired babies, or having to hurry and get somewhere else) Well, we finally did it. And much to the disappointment to Stockton!!!<br />
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I wanted to surprise the boys because all too often I find myself telling the boys we are going to do something, and then for some reason or another if falls through. Austin kept telling the boys to hurry and get ready because we were going to go for a ride. Stockton took this literally! When we pulled up he was excited but when we went to leave is when the drama started. <br />
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Stockton- This is the worst ride ever!<br />
Me- What's wrong, I thought you'd be excited, you've wanted to do this forever.<br />
Stock- I thought we were going on a roller coaster.<br />
Me- Ohhh, I'm sorry Stock, when we said "ride" we meant to go somewhere in the car.<br />
Stock- This really is the worst ride ever- now with tears freely flowing.<br />
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After we all got in the car to head home- the drama continued. :)<br />
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Stock- Dad, when you die- I am going to go to that place where they put you and take your wallet.<br />
Austin- what?<br />
Stock- Yep, when you die I am going to take your wallet so I can do whatever I want to when I want. <br />
Austin- Well, I am pretty sure when I die, your mom gets my wallet.<br />
Stock- Well then when you die and when mom dies and when Staley dies but not Kenzlie<br />
Staley- Stockton will you please stop, you are making me sad.<br />
Stock- Ok well nobody has to die, but can I have your wallet and then I will give you money for what you need... I wish I was in Grandma Parry's stomach first before mom then I could be in charge...<br />
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.....and he kept going...and going. :)<br />
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Holy Cow- I think he was tired. <br />
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This was all in about a 10 minute span. Funny thing is about 5 minutes later I asked him if he was done throwing his tantrum and he acted like he had no clue what I was talking about. This is SO typical of Stockton, and not too uncommon in the Binks home :) <br />
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Gotta love my boys! <br />
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Now tell me that's not random. :)Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-52846734689793944322010-09-09T22:36:00.000-06:002010-09-09T22:36:01.897-06:00Happy Birthday Baby Girl!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoox4xNXgnEwT1Ln6vgcKNFtb6nMPunF0Cxf47XdmrJaf2AhkYbQ3ixK6giv6sMZFG_kPLHFj2zBQpbuy5FzL2Cikzd3gglyssWgGF_wgk_oArtFCOqICsxL0m1rkQv2vPsQmSmpQLXcHY/s1600/Copy+of+IMG_0134.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoox4xNXgnEwT1Ln6vgcKNFtb6nMPunF0Cxf47XdmrJaf2AhkYbQ3ixK6giv6sMZFG_kPLHFj2zBQpbuy5FzL2Cikzd3gglyssWgGF_wgk_oArtFCOqICsxL0m1rkQv2vPsQmSmpQLXcHY/s400/Copy+of+IMG_0134.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><br />
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Well, it is official- yesterday marked what would be my baby girl Kamberlie's 6th birthday! Can you believe that!? It is amazing how fast time flies by, yet stands still all at the same time. One month shy of 3 years since Kambrie left us for something so much better. Oh how I miss her. We had a good day. Austin came home early so we could take the kids to Jungle Jim's Playhouse. ( Kamberlie always wanted to go there for her birthday, so that is where we would always go). It is oh so dirty, but the kids could care less and they pretty much love it there. :) It was definitely a day of reflection, a day of longing and missing, a day full of love, and a day that will be cherished forever. Afterwards we went up to the Larkin Cemetery in Sandy. I love the place that we were able to pick out for Kamberlie... it is so beautiful and peaceful there. One of these days I will have to post pictures of her marker and bench- I can't imagine having anything less than perfect for her, and that is exactly what she got. Staley struggled a little bit, but he was very strong. He doesn't like going to the cemetery, so he wanted to stay in the car and I have to tell you, my heart still breaks for that little man. He is such an amazing little boy that has had to deal with really hard things. His strength amazes me! We then came home and each had a pink balloon (thanks to Carolyn..love you!) that we held onto- we each had a chance to share a memory of our sweet Kamberlie and then let a pink balloon go in her behalf- a little tradition we started right after she died and has stuck. I love hearing what my boys have to say... Stockton refused to let his balloon go saying it was too special. Pretty cute. Definitely a humbling day. The boys ate a piece of cake and called it a day... they LOVED it. It was perfect for them and perfect for me. I can't quite picture my baby girl as 6 years old!! In fact, I often see little girls that were the same age she was and how they grow and just try to imagine what she would look like, what she would act like, and who she would be- but, I can't- she will forever be my beautiful little 3 year old, and that is ok for me. <br />
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Happy Birthday baby girl.... I love and miss you oh so much!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRZjyeTl4FYzhbdaDDZ2F9anpq_8jhhJBO_AO4C40ImV4baL7cBqcarxc_bR67idmiz0k9a2VOCm8vgsv-j8bDcH4vO-ZmGfVS1Ov7XN0uZMLRI6m6zrX1PCxT3D41zv_HYPCfWiQYRdom/s1600/June+28+2007+Tea+Party+(2).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRZjyeTl4FYzhbdaDDZ2F9anpq_8jhhJBO_AO4C40ImV4baL7cBqcarxc_bR67idmiz0k9a2VOCm8vgsv-j8bDcH4vO-ZmGfVS1Ov7XN0uZMLRI6m6zrX1PCxT3D41zv_HYPCfWiQYRdom/s400/June+28+2007+Tea+Party+(2).JPG" width="400" /></a></div><br />
If there is one thing I have truly learned over the past few years- it is that we ALL have to face really, really hard things in this life. There isn't one of us who will get away from going through some sort of heartache, some sort of pain, or some sort of incredible loss- none of us can escape that. I am not the only one that struggles, that cries and wishes for things to be different. We all face trials in our lives, and it is up to us how we use those trials to either strengthen us for the better, or tear us down to nothingness. I am grateful for what I have learned and the opportunity I have been given to have some kind of understanding and compassion for others, who too, have been faced with extremely difficult trials to overcome- I know I can't comprehend there exact emotions or sadness, but I have to tell you- I have a completely different outlook on things now then I did 3 years ago! I was so incredibly oblivious to what was truly going on around me. I don't know if I have shared this on the blog- but I remember right after Kamberlie died and we were trying to get everything done for the funeral- I just remember walking through the mall thinking to myself how selfish I had been all theses years... here I was planning my baby girl's funeral and feeling so extremely hollow ( can't explain it much better than that) and yet, not one person there at the mall had any clue. How long had I been one of "those people"? Pretty much forever. I genuinely felt bad for someone when something happened, but I had absolutely NO clue what they were having to deal with. I am grateful that I can somewhat relate now. <br />
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There truly is good that comes from the bad.<br />
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I am grateful for the opportunity to be here on this earth at this time, for the trials I have had to deal with and for the chance I have to prove that I can do this, that I can make it and make my baby girl proud to call me her mom. I love all my babies so, so much. Grateful that I can love them and hug them and let them know how extremely proud I am of each one of them every single day. Don't ever take one moment for granted... let those you love know it! xoxo<br />
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I love you all so, so much- and I am completely sincere when I say thank you for everything.... truly. :)Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-41652010940265738542010-08-15T14:28:00.000-06:002010-08-15T14:28:59.766-06:00My heart broke...A few months ago I saw a video on facebook where a man just broke down sobbing/screaming uncontrollably. You could see that he pretty much had hit rock bottom. - I have to say, to some- they thought it was so funny and I guess I can kind of understand that- but for me...not so much. It hit too close to home and I could relate 100 percent to the pain this man was feeling. It is an uncontrollable cry from within, that you can't stop even if you want to. It broke my heart, and I too cried watching it.<br />
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Well, Austin and I went to Park City for a few days for our anniversary. While we were there, I saw a message that said "Our hearts and prayers go out to the Gaily family." I asked Austin if he knew what was going on...but he didn't. We got home late last night, Austin woke up early this morning for meetings. He came home to get me for church, then he told me about an amazing man in our neighborhood that passed away on Friday morning in a motorcycle accident. I have to tell you, my heart literally broke for the Gaily family! All of those raw emotions that I remember feeling came pouring into my mind. Not completely knowing the exact emotions that this sister and her family have to deal with losing a husband and a father, but being able to comprehend to some degree how it feels to lose someone you love more than anything in this world. Remembering the shock, the incredible hurt, and trying to figure out the unimaginable unknown... all things, looking back, that I can't fathom having to go through. But I did- definitely not on my own. We have an incredible community/neighborhood that stepped right up and did everything imaginable to help our little family get through this extremely difficult time. Our amazing family, our friends, hundreds of prayers from complete strangers...all got us through, but also- I know without a doubt that my Father in Heaven was protecting us, comforting us, and helping us through.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>So, to add to my sweet neighbors plea- Our hearts and prayers go out to the Gaily family as well!<br />
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</div><div>*Please pray for them during this extremely difficult time in their lives!*<br />
Thanks. . </div>Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-73890859635768215312010-08-15T14:21:00.000-06:002010-08-15T14:21:01.123-06:0010 YEARS!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8AVw92hRM_DGt24NNdj110DL_zjVX_rxO8cDAW6jfg3CqhOk2bEThJhvZC1zArCUZl-CURo48jOixCcB8AYqpkuJm89Y5hn-2_v5iyRxAqGZ0EfYfAIQTVnk4fr36czsJ8bHCIvvEWBJX/s1600/IMG_1765.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8AVw92hRM_DGt24NNdj110DL_zjVX_rxO8cDAW6jfg3CqhOk2bEThJhvZC1zArCUZl-CURo48jOixCcB8AYqpkuJm89Y5hn-2_v5iyRxAqGZ0EfYfAIQTVnk4fr36czsJ8bHCIvvEWBJX/s320/IMG_1765.jpg" /></a></div>Holy Cow! 10 Years!! To some people this may seem like nothing- but to me it is everything! :) 10 years ago today (August 15, 2000) Austin and I were married. I have to say- it has been amazing. The last few years have been quite the journey, but we have pulled through it- together! I don't know how I did it, but I snagged the most incredible man ever. I feel so grateful to have him in my life, and to call him mine. Austin inspires me, believes in me, and loves me. Thanks babe, for the best 10 years- here is to the future. *I love you*Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-16118188582149265312010-08-09T15:57:00.003-06:002010-08-09T21:47:36.843-06:00Remember When....My cute little sister Coley, printed a book of her blog a little while ago, and let me just tell you how much I love it!! I SO love it. So, because this is my "journal" I really wanted to incorporate the old with the new- hence my title Remember When... I want to start sharing so many of my memories before my blogging adventure started. So I will start picking random pictures and videos to share... so we will always remember them when I finally print out my book!:) <br />
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So the adventure starts now. :) <br />
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Remember When....<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVb5JcL3er-5ud5t8uBPIK_bK4OdJCu9UJz3rZ3lBc3jkZx9b9YokJboz0nRxTpMmNvVjuN2mIqigRCT3i-61nQqNx7pavgIlCveFv-NQJd2U3mW44sovfM53_86AWoRqJ5ScjQ3sblJKK/s1600/Oct+26th+2007+Chicken-Rooser+%26+Haloween+Cruise+(19).JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5503524414597667922" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVb5JcL3er-5ud5t8uBPIK_bK4OdJCu9UJz3rZ3lBc3jkZx9b9YokJboz0nRxTpMmNvVjuN2mIqigRCT3i-61nQqNx7pavgIlCveFv-NQJd2U3mW44sovfM53_86AWoRqJ5ScjQ3sblJKK/s320/Oct+26th+2007+Chicken-Rooser+%26+Haloween+Cruise+(19).JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0dE2MntpBehp-k01zrO7mM_u7te05kurYQLk06fvL6dmsg25iU2amWJsyA_IRS6BiI9SL1WR76zd-L82aTRCY97DLJXGznRWLcRUS4PW00pZUe0O8NhAEVn2BXBwkupq8W_Z7pxgQNndj/s1600/Oct+26th+2007+Chicken-Rooser+%26+Haloween+Cruise+(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0dE2MntpBehp-k01zrO7mM_u7te05kurYQLk06fvL6dmsg25iU2amWJsyA_IRS6BiI9SL1WR76zd-L82aTRCY97DLJXGznRWLcRUS4PW00pZUe0O8NhAEVn2BXBwkupq8W_Z7pxgQNndj/s320/Oct+26th+2007+Chicken-Rooser+%26+Haloween+Cruise+(7).JPG" /></a></div><br />
October 2007- Halloween<br />
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Ok, I have to admit, this was the funniest Halloween ever. So, me, trying to be super thrifty- thought it would be the perfect idea to take the kids to Kid To Kid and let them pick out their own costumes...BAD idea. Staley found this horrific rooster costume which he completely fell in love with the minute he saw it! I was at the point in my life where I was really trying not to make all the decisions for my boys, but really value their opinion- Needless to say, this is how it turned out! :)<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwCLz4AM6kW7-FbGuswd4vaV9MXBgk9brAZ2p1aOSequ_KXHkxs9nCvwnmzduCAR0c-i-IZw_35BlogGk7xKQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
Funny thing is...last year we had our first ever yard sale...Staley wore this costume all day, and it was a hot day...by the end of the sale a girl was driving by, saw Staley and asked if he would sale his rooster costume...with much negotiation- he sold it for 5 bucks. I have to tell you I don't miss it so much!<br />
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Oh how I love my boys!!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-31328577982788715832010-08-07T12:27:00.005-06:002010-08-07T12:38:36.734-06:00My beautiful children!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGKCmLVMHBKR29fZC57LzA-gW4-HkkPOQTFVOVUM-Dh-QGPmekaZDBRqmBzsa7fPEiOQBppt4kYTapZbQVEst8gNnOpjXU_OpSHzccfzralOAtmHbo9mxAAUHwIO9Pp6a3i3wwTVpSyA9a/s1600/IMG_2886-sep.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGKCmLVMHBKR29fZC57LzA-gW4-HkkPOQTFVOVUM-Dh-QGPmekaZDBRqmBzsa7fPEiOQBppt4kYTapZbQVEst8gNnOpjXU_OpSHzccfzralOAtmHbo9mxAAUHwIO9Pp6a3i3wwTVpSyA9a/s320/IMG_2886-sep.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502737681144459458" /></a><br /><br />Go on.. tell me I have the cutest kids ever... go on, just tell me. :) I LOVE my babies. I am grateful for every single one of them. I love how they are so different, but yet so similar. I am so, so lucky!!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-2648824079621709362010-08-07T11:29:00.005-06:002010-08-11T12:12:53.851-06:00Coming full circle...Well here I am at home all alone. Austin is working today, and my kids are at my parents home for the weekend- so I thought, what a perfect time to update my blog.:) I have to say, I am not a huge fan of being by myself. I never really have been. As crazy as it can get around here, I truly love the commotion and craziness... especially when it is gone. I love my kids so much and although they have only been gone one day, I honestly missed them the minute they drove away. There is nothing like being a mom. (I know I am a broken record when it comes to this)- but I love my family more than anything in this world! What an incredible gift I have been given! My husband is more than I could have ever dreamed. He is an incredible man with so many talents, and he too loves his family. What an amazing blessing! :) <br />
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Now that summer has come, and the end is nearing- I am full of mixed emotions. I LOVE summer, like really LOVE it! There is nothing better than being able to have nothing on the agenda but playtime- and we play! We are always going somewhere or doing something and my kids love it just as much as I do. We just fly through the summer- not a worry in the world, and it is perfect. Reality is setting in- and in just 3 short weeks we will be back to the crazy schedules and constantly running here and there. But, I must say, I miss the structure. I like having family dinner at the same time every night and bedtime at 8 o'clock. I love getting up super early and exercising and having things mostly done before my kids even wake up... I think summer gives me the break I need to get myself motivated to get back into the swing of things. Oh, but how I will miss summer!! <br />
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So my last post was in June... and as you can tell I was pretty much a basket case. Ok, I admit it- I WAS a basket case. I know, I know, story of my life right? :) I feel that since that time (although it has only been about 2 months) I have truly had some powerful insight and I am working hard- really hard- to be incredibly grateful for what I do have, what I have been blessed with, and the knowledge I have been given. I am coming around. I am proud of myself. I am truly grateful for my trials, which may seem strange- it seems strange for me to even really say that, but I am. <br />
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Austin and I had an amazing opportunity to go speak to a group of youth from Payson at their youth conference they had in Delta, Ut. The spirit was strong, the kids were great. It really made me miss working with the youth in the church. Austin did an amazing job, which is so typical for Austin. I love listening to him speak. He is so strong and his knowledge is unbelievable to me. After our talk they went into a testimony meeting that really was so neat to be a part of. Those kids are strong. I don't think they realize their potential, but I don't know how many of us realize our potential either. We were all put on this earth for a purpose. Are we living up to that? I don't think I have. After the meeting all the youth came and hugged us and thanked us, but I really wanted to thank them. They gave me a glimpse of what I missed about myself. One of the bishopric members made a comment to me that has really stuck with me. He said, "Can you even fathom what an amazing person your daughter must be? I think when you get to raise her and really get to know her- you will really be amazed at the person she is." I too have thought that, but this time- someone saying it- really struck me. Kamberlie was so needed- and it was her time to go. She was perfect, she didn't need to be tested- her test was through. What an incredible feeling it is to know that she was mine...that she IS mine. I know I can learn a lot of things from her. I am grateful to call myself her mom, as I am to call myself the mother of all my children. I don't know what has happened in the past couple of months but I feel like I have finally woken up- why did it take so long for me to come to the realization of what this life is? I have known it all along, my baby girl has made it.. isn't that what we are all longing for, isn't that what we are all longing to become? <br />
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I am not sure why things have to happen the way they do, or why we have to deal with them the way we do... but in the end, looking back, what an incredible journey of hurting, learning, loving, and growing. I know tomorrow I could face another set back, it isn't necessarily too uncommon around here, but in the end... I feel like I have made it. I feel like I am finally coming full circle, and I am ready for what is to come. I am looking forward to the future.Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-52310134704830195042010-08-07T08:00:00.001-06:002010-08-09T15:50:05.287-06:00My handsome little man!<img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502790121521825378" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizUktUZD_muL2tg_pi4FwKWKR2tq46OX8SMp43cI0JnE9CaISpSL1_Z3ijPihnyDvJYNesUBcxN8qvUkOeRXPZgKOtJeHjKcM8_XifKYOHnIPivIKF2pFIWTD_SUprWLdMfYHV9yuP9PEV/s320/Austin's+Camera+down+loaded+July+2010+235.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" />Okay, I know this picture is kind of sad, but just look at how cute he is! On Monday, Aug.2 Austin and I were on our way to Primary Children's Hospital to take our busy Taysen to get tubes in his ears. My cute little sister Nicole woke up at 3:45 in the morning to come all the way down to my house to watch our other kids while we had to be to the hospital by 6AM. I have to tell you, I was pretty nervous and I know Taysen was too, but he was so brave! All in all the surgery went good, Taysen did great and hopefully we won't have another winter full of sickness! (poor guy) <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKib3WkmDtlUMUKNGA42cHKxjoV1WStrgUKbevqHGk2BrrBmvzGEHNh0al6UbStykLI_yaUYXNfiTy3Ch7w1si5hwfAtup8EsoKjtQG0OLdJcMo7-_BDSSkPawKMwupQIngWz2v1rCZB90/s1600/DSC09768.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502792668950296114" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKib3WkmDtlUMUKNGA42cHKxjoV1WStrgUKbevqHGk2BrrBmvzGEHNh0al6UbStykLI_yaUYXNfiTy3Ch7w1si5hwfAtup8EsoKjtQG0OLdJcMo7-_BDSSkPawKMwupQIngWz2v1rCZB90/s320/DSC09768.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 320px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 240px;" /></a> <br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsOAcc41x0b4plh24xPU9E7wn3F-Uvg6CFAS7YHb2tBoAjfBPqCqOXXcfxxQZOaYfOjc3u3FuYlnoFq6x5b_7jZJ9ZfGzDBnsPEnklkKi2CIH81z1Ng00qZij2cJ1nJbV6CaT1EbIhfyVb/s1600/DSC09765.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502792662190779346" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsOAcc41x0b4plh24xPU9E7wn3F-Uvg6CFAS7YHb2tBoAjfBPqCqOXXcfxxQZOaYfOjc3u3FuYlnoFq6x5b_7jZJ9ZfGzDBnsPEnklkKi2CIH81z1Ng00qZij2cJ1nJbV6CaT1EbIhfyVb/s320/DSC09765.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 320px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 240px;" /></a> <br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6ByCb92aS9_6EOIstqUqevYJHI0TNedVQ2UZ2eFRGBor309W5wnVYGLNjrtBPWJSnhT480ui9W-WoEO76koa784fhBwk820Z5iKFce5XWylOPx5L_nSZ5XP8crXPvSAS1Onjm91R1hVfR/s1600/DSC09762.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502792653145944050" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6ByCb92aS9_6EOIstqUqevYJHI0TNedVQ2UZ2eFRGBor309W5wnVYGLNjrtBPWJSnhT480ui9W-WoEO76koa784fhBwk820Z5iKFce5XWylOPx5L_nSZ5XP8crXPvSAS1Onjm91R1hVfR/s320/DSC09762.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a> <br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRJYE_M0GLHeoJjAepg8DYWYn-yW7_c1g0dj4xLzo5WosLtQOhWtlNGT7xgtha-zmGARfRukBe3d9hcWOimOFIT4MlLC580X-Vg5RzinFsm866xaiLacvcyo07bb7TvkEj4E8xPpcCU7FS/s1600/DSC09760.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502792645536933506" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRJYE_M0GLHeoJjAepg8DYWYn-yW7_c1g0dj4xLzo5WosLtQOhWtlNGT7xgtha-zmGARfRukBe3d9hcWOimOFIT4MlLC580X-Vg5RzinFsm866xaiLacvcyo07bb7TvkEj4E8xPpcCU7FS/s320/DSC09760.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a> <br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizUktUZD_muL2tg_pi4FwKWKR2tq46OX8SMp43cI0JnE9CaISpSL1_Z3ijPihnyDvJYNesUBcxN8qvUkOeRXPZgKOtJeHjKcM8_XifKYOHnIPivIKF2pFIWTD_SUprWLdMfYHV9yuP9PEV/s1600/Austin's+Camera+down+loaded+July+2010+235.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimzqoAp4OlBnV_Ud0jwONuWdFPh6_aiJaflhIm6flPgMOnTbJmCsWE3nunaHcdd049lqw-LxEEI2RRRIFmynF3-uiqQoeqhN-jihguujaorRRzjtyrhKsBxTVgKSbiLkyC1UlXlZNT-IQv/s1600/DSC09771.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502792675504906738" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimzqoAp4OlBnV_Ud0jwONuWdFPh6_aiJaflhIm6flPgMOnTbJmCsWE3nunaHcdd049lqw-LxEEI2RRRIFmynF3-uiqQoeqhN-jihguujaorRRzjtyrhKsBxTVgKSbiLkyC1UlXlZNT-IQv/s320/DSC09771.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a> <br />
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All last week Taysen was crazy happy... let's hope it lasts. :)Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-33013284511556550262010-08-06T13:04:00.004-06:002010-08-07T15:47:10.791-06:00Summer Fun...Our family was able to do a lot this summer. Our biggest venue...it would have to be swimming. Give me or any of my kids water and we are there. We LOVE to go to the pool, or the lake, or the splash pad...well you get the idea. :) <br />No fancy vacations this summer just LOTS of good, quality time together as a family- isn't that the best anyway? Here some are of the fun things we were able to do.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM61KdwO7Pk87fL7c5sRXMQjKmJvQ4Vng5Fkpnl43A3Gj-JNLMrxFeorKfBP4PU5UYb26KsVbTGa3q_bhKdE5Cszll0xwnY4xs89QGglAWkVI13aYGgnkMQ3GqDi437FGB1XhW6Ul6HkEp/s1600/IMG_1541.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM61KdwO7Pk87fL7c5sRXMQjKmJvQ4Vng5Fkpnl43A3Gj-JNLMrxFeorKfBP4PU5UYb26KsVbTGa3q_bhKdE5Cszll0xwnY4xs89QGglAWkVI13aYGgnkMQ3GqDi437FGB1XhW6Ul6HkEp/s320/IMG_1541.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502751419460896594" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZXY7xEfuhpubZy8ARSOxWKuYRrAXfKduxoj3bo7ywY3f2nZ_xIiuCnAJUt03itmzodUGNib9aNpqkVqHirYaCyD42abEkHo0xmtMTySBVjSyMnQvlKp24H0axTJigF3VGk5wUP7pf9k8E/s1600/IMG_1530.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZXY7xEfuhpubZy8ARSOxWKuYRrAXfKduxoj3bo7ywY3f2nZ_xIiuCnAJUt03itmzodUGNib9aNpqkVqHirYaCyD42abEkHo0xmtMTySBVjSyMnQvlKp24H0axTJigF3VGk5wUP7pf9k8E/s320/IMG_1530.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502751406649130866" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOBQ6UKl0p8DOww13_XhzophVKCW_2jxRu5pj6p1qhE6sP0N9cZLYSAUTry-Uv4hz_j5a8uqU8mT7oaNcS2uQXaq8vX3o00yd7URkwMubagYj691L6D-Z_0Pj4vXylu4W6UWC8nAzKhL5S/s1600/DSC07327.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOBQ6UKl0p8DOww13_XhzophVKCW_2jxRu5pj6p1qhE6sP0N9cZLYSAUTry-Uv4hz_j5a8uqU8mT7oaNcS2uQXaq8vX3o00yd7URkwMubagYj691L6D-Z_0Pj4vXylu4W6UWC8nAzKhL5S/s320/DSC07327.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502751394669853970" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibXFmMSFBtyq1F4_lU2xAqebM5D5nP0XqgQGvES_rEe5GT8o7Uy23A-hx5ZuIBYOKkLVbGereNjMhPX8EexFs8Df_JVLwIXKB2n82jujcP6mKS8JnH8RDSdG1U9yt8m1FilaAyqBvXnebt/s1600/DSC07366.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibXFmMSFBtyq1F4_lU2xAqebM5D5nP0XqgQGvES_rEe5GT8o7Uy23A-hx5ZuIBYOKkLVbGereNjMhPX8EexFs8Df_JVLwIXKB2n82jujcP6mKS8JnH8RDSdG1U9yt8m1FilaAyqBvXnebt/s320/DSC07366.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502751386882667458" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhZ5pjTymsBz672NmkhN2Vw3919h6geuCkr5X8ITvoDhugnqDgwHY1szyNY6PNqfxZ2_AZSIzNHvS9wP446SSjjAXDevvMJ0Av3KFU_1ArLP0V4mncgoITUxc7bi51s7S0R41Z9kKNybVy/s1600/IMG_1716.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhZ5pjTymsBz672NmkhN2Vw3919h6geuCkr5X8ITvoDhugnqDgwHY1szyNY6PNqfxZ2_AZSIzNHvS9wP446SSjjAXDevvMJ0Av3KFU_1ArLP0V4mncgoITUxc7bi51s7S0R41Z9kKNybVy/s320/IMG_1716.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502783106096581650" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz67LeH-zsFeo3mxfmEUCIhJlrwKHG2U_iqGXwWH1VYP9zivUGO-_vZHiASZLEwGmDO4hJgr8SSg_zkjT1zmS0J1RfH9u0uyOeB6yr1JdH6Chz4pqL7ZlmGY9snWtdu2dMPyjucHlfsERj/s1600/IMG_1650.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz67LeH-zsFeo3mxfmEUCIhJlrwKHG2U_iqGXwWH1VYP9zivUGO-_vZHiASZLEwGmDO4hJgr8SSg_zkjT1zmS0J1RfH9u0uyOeB6yr1JdH6Chz4pqL7ZlmGY9snWtdu2dMPyjucHlfsERj/s320/IMG_1650.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502783098860713378" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIm8dK1eEnAbn9FyPa8EmM3lH4PJS9DwmXEN7ccZSkFw1ffYQA0HILTg-_8ovVBUN9Y85ZTtzuqvAQv6PTAlv6GDAqT2T1jbbmlFCWkVufvd7gmibXkQE6wUS2b3nZGMSbDYdH_U0Hauvd/s1600/IMG_1648.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIm8dK1eEnAbn9FyPa8EmM3lH4PJS9DwmXEN7ccZSkFw1ffYQA0HILTg-_8ovVBUN9Y85ZTtzuqvAQv6PTAlv6GDAqT2T1jbbmlFCWkVufvd7gmibXkQE6wUS2b3nZGMSbDYdH_U0Hauvd/s320/IMG_1648.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502783087914230898" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1EoP63aSYluLGWjimMvL0GYg6NaWSoprhso0nmF644WPa7cTCh2UQUolUlY2BNqiKD4AeQfd661Abf4YzD7SVAOhcS9H91n5FzEUrgfoIl5pDjY_pylwEReI0uqUBP85D8Js1r6s03BrI/s1600/DSC07394.JPG"><img style="display:block; 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margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh-h-IYKCCJ_3KKL9h9KuGeqkmtQ4WFirOiZj5Rcl7UGCiV1J2Dt9Lpr62nJ63Pe8gVyBLM0ZjPXicOFKfgcxDZ6W47tIXQDethC18leUIVVQmrX2ibi3XR-a7Qgn3DfEMW1wiZQQV5twU/s320/June+2010+Pictures+063.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502763953100737234" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qp4w3q4j7HospkSrtm3kSLEoNnL4qJxdl0Izp0Te8pUh-dsC__IIVSxOD2PzbahNzGfFyjrPvxe9_TktwOv2otkUdG2Ar1hPrau5E3tvHrIAE8tVKheJL4dv9qpsrAoK2w1F0NbQb9Ky/s1600/June+2010+Pictures+038.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qp4w3q4j7HospkSrtm3kSLEoNnL4qJxdl0Izp0Te8pUh-dsC__IIVSxOD2PzbahNzGfFyjrPvxe9_TktwOv2otkUdG2Ar1hPrau5E3tvHrIAE8tVKheJL4dv9qpsrAoK2w1F0NbQb9Ky/s320/June+2010+Pictures+038.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502763950279413522" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTDt34RSWdT71XVsyTLEFfImLs8TrJMvmPw5dcmVu_5iqjcn5SLgC3GumkCU1d7Bv1fWP3rch0NvrPN568BV4CPHMxk2fcjv-GUY9I934yJ2_tDiAiXduoGAecAEmCzcEq7qbkp802eYIx/s1600/IMG_1622.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTDt34RSWdT71XVsyTLEFfImLs8TrJMvmPw5dcmVu_5iqjcn5SLgC3GumkCU1d7Bv1fWP3rch0NvrPN568BV4CPHMxk2fcjv-GUY9I934yJ2_tDiAiXduoGAecAEmCzcEq7qbkp802eYIx/s320/IMG_1622.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502760106263762194" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOXAap0s8yBvUOiZOfSn3X2s9jpob1m02u6WBouHdmhjm2bLV_07ww5oNI2_9C1v2FwitMWyMQhhYnpLJ1O_LpYimPcwIMfR7qUd43P3hdZCCPuAKtKcgxX9X37JhPsWNLGgdB-mV9U_uD/s1600/IMG_1600.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOXAap0s8yBvUOiZOfSn3X2s9jpob1m02u6WBouHdmhjm2bLV_07ww5oNI2_9C1v2FwitMWyMQhhYnpLJ1O_LpYimPcwIMfR7qUd43P3hdZCCPuAKtKcgxX9X37JhPsWNLGgdB-mV9U_uD/s320/IMG_1600.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502760102011993010" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC_iHmch4owyDU9-q8U_7K9pymNUBIi5rBZ_nQKmTM0FwL7avlCBIEgBGHZRb7bC0kc3GtCHuNg5DJabMHpR8NCZ3l-dPjXHdOEsH0GKk4rV1GNr27dZJx1bXLeCRzUmP5rnJAaq40TEU6/s1600/IMG_1588.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC_iHmch4owyDU9-q8U_7K9pymNUBIi5rBZ_nQKmTM0FwL7avlCBIEgBGHZRb7bC0kc3GtCHuNg5DJabMHpR8NCZ3l-dPjXHdOEsH0GKk4rV1GNr27dZJx1bXLeCRzUmP5rnJAaq40TEU6/s320/IMG_1588.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502760092635139442" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNE4DP_eobL61Kc4MNxWpUr1en4EHdYwJ_AQjEg9vbaSWUvT3cN-AqOJy97CwQBnu0SYTBEBbRi7NI31ApxabKnqWkTb_8wTxlCY7_hF0gO52fB8Gu7mSkFmQl1cSUXWhTneYb8fa83nAv/s1600/IMG_1568.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNE4DP_eobL61Kc4MNxWpUr1en4EHdYwJ_AQjEg9vbaSWUvT3cN-AqOJy97CwQBnu0SYTBEBbRi7NI31ApxabKnqWkTb_8wTxlCY7_hF0gO52fB8Gu7mSkFmQl1cSUXWhTneYb8fa83nAv/s320/IMG_1568.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502760083700575650" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6NQaZcXGLcpkZTCPv0LKh9amlpZffGus6_wazwzDyVqG8nfxIp3JgggmWlh7CgRIijpd3GB6jGxdCLX5hCTZnUfB8DMcdpZgoHBF7dUK3YcaTWOsDENbHYasvciTKxK1m6JD6TW1Lue9F/s1600/IMG_1739.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6NQaZcXGLcpkZTCPv0LKh9amlpZffGus6_wazwzDyVqG8nfxIp3JgggmWlh7CgRIijpd3GB6jGxdCLX5hCTZnUfB8DMcdpZgoHBF7dUK3YcaTWOsDENbHYasvciTKxK1m6JD6TW1Lue9F/s320/IMG_1739.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502786608487343490" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmKnnQIhvy_gw9yNR-VjQVm29ZGOBf5JG4scJlJnFLePivHuIF1XbY3lcFyYuYT8X-SYRjqHmEdjBUvCCYfiZry-JNpe9Tf6iGqx8OaY1g_sYtoDba6BeF3__C8BWm101-SDW0xQ2Lsqa4/s1600/IMG_1728.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmKnnQIhvy_gw9yNR-VjQVm29ZGOBf5JG4scJlJnFLePivHuIF1XbY3lcFyYuYT8X-SYRjqHmEdjBUvCCYfiZry-JNpe9Tf6iGqx8OaY1g_sYtoDba6BeF3__C8BWm101-SDW0xQ2Lsqa4/s320/IMG_1728.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502786598746211842" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ-xlvg9KOu0BgR_Yf5rmjPeoJ9a_XraTvo8WjBFc7gnNFYSrlNome47vXzBYcWYO4lJTioBnBpJ7aIcSXaKEZYvLe2mmzma9rsvFoxiKcFTpzb3zlfHyfhFmQ66FzR82rvku5rOCFea7Q/s1600/IMG_1724.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ-xlvg9KOu0BgR_Yf5rmjPeoJ9a_XraTvo8WjBFc7gnNFYSrlNome47vXzBYcWYO4lJTioBnBpJ7aIcSXaKEZYvLe2mmzma9rsvFoxiKcFTpzb3zlfHyfhFmQ66FzR82rvku5rOCFea7Q/s320/IMG_1724.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502786589831490146" /></a><br /><br />With 3 more weeks of summer to go, I am sure we will still have many more adventures. :) I love the time I get to spend with my family- there really isn't anything better!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-82311907713047256402010-06-02T14:46:00.003-06:002010-06-02T15:11:23.052-06:00Just thought I would share....First of all... let me apologize for anyone who read my previous post! If that isn't a funk... I don't know what is! Memorial Weekend kicked my trash- big time. Hard/sad weekend- but it was honestly so nice to finally just have everything out in the open... no more bottling it up- just a complete broken heart. I seem to feel SO much better when I can just let the walls down and be human- but I put myself in an awkward situation that I will probably regret in a few days, but today I don't care... This is me...<br /><br />Okay- enough of that! <br /><br />I was on my way out to my car after zumba class today and another instructor who was leaving (Ana- for anyone who knows her :)) stopped in the middle of the road rolled down the window and asked, "So, when are you getting pregnant again!?" I couldn't stop laughing... I know I am quite the sight. Picture this- Here am I- one arm has my gym bag, water bottle, diaper bag and Taysen- (my super cute 1 1/2 yr old) Other arm... Kenzlie (now 4 months- also super cute) in her monster carrier, with stockton (4 yrs.he too is..yep, you guessed it- super cute) holding on to my back pocket so he doesn't get smashed by a car.... I can't really say that I know how I look- but I get comments ALL the time! So I know it must be pretty bad! :) And.... to add to that- I teach sports cycling- ( spinning/sports drills/stairs....class) Well, yesterday I was SO not feeling good- still in my funk obviously- I asked my class a couple of times if anyone else felt like they were going to puke... probably 4 different people at the same time asked if I was pregnant- again! For the record...No, I am not. But it is funny that for the past 6 1/2 years I have practically ALWAYS been pregnant, and everyone I know- knows that. :)<br /><br />I love, love, love being a mom! And as silly as I look- I wouldn't trade it for the world! I am so incredibly grateful for every single one of my babies!! I am truly SO blessed! <br /><br />...just thought I would share. :)Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-50472768383358573952010-06-01T12:29:00.007-06:002010-06-02T15:25:50.178-06:00Rambling....and rambling...and rambling....Okay, okay... I am finally just going to do it! :) It has been pretty much forever since my last post ( did you miss me!? ) and with that being said- I have been feeling oh so sorry for myself! Why? Why do I do this over and over- why is it that I can be soaring, things are going just short of perfect... and then it happens... the plummet! I feel like I have to dig myself out and feel things all over again. Things that I have already had to feel and experience and struggle through, but yet I go through this vicious circle yet again- and I just don't want to do it anymore, to feel it anymore- but- in all reality... this too shall pass-right!? Always does. :) <br /><br />I know, I know poor me.. I just want nothing more to feel like a normal person and be happy just to be happy and live my amazing life I have been given. But REALLY live! I get into these little self pity moments... and then I step back, look at my beautiful family, my amazing husband, my family and friends who have supported me through all my struggles and trials and how selfish am I? Are things ever going to be the same? Of course not. I know this, I realize this.. I just really miss me. I miss who I was. I miss how I was. I can't ever go back and that makes me sad. But I have really been trying to find the new me... and let me just tell you how extremely difficult that is- oh my goodness. <br /><br />I was able to attend an amazing meeting at our grief group before we ended for the summer. The spirit was so incredibly strong and the feelings were so raw, but so honest. It was perfect... it was exactly what I needed on that day and I have reflected on that meeting often. I know I am never going to be the same Kim as I once was- I really do get that. As much as I want to go back, I can't- so it is time to move forward-once again. How lucky am I to really get it- to understand what this life is all about and cherish every little thing. Although I know sometimes it may seem I am completely absorbed and overwhelmed in my pity- I do really get it! I cherish my time on this earth, I cherish my children and my husband- I understand incredible sadness and pain. I am extremely grateful for all that I have. and all I have been given.. I am learning how to deal with really hard things in my life, and I am positive this is nothing less than a blessing! I know Heavenly Father knows what he is doing... I know that there is a purpose for my sweet Kamberlie's return and a purpose for me to go through this extremely hard trial... I know it has opened my eyes quite a bit... and things that seemed to matter so much before, I realize now ... really didn't matter at all. <br /><br />My cute friend, Karla, from the gym told me today that her mom lost a child, and I can't remember if she said the baby was 10 days old....? Anyway, she said that 40 years later her mom still gets sad. That was pretty comforting to me. I am glad it is ok. I try to tell myself that it has been 2 1/2 years and I need to get over the incredible sadness I still feel, because the situation isn't going to change... but then I have to tell myself it is ok to be sad and miss my baby girl, and in all reality it hasn't really been that long...right? I just can't let it consume me. <br /><br />The truth of it is, the reason I think I have such an incredibly hard time with it all... I just feel so sad. I feel so guilty. I feel 100 percent responsible, and I think that is why I have such a hard time dealing with it all. You see...( I have only shared this once, may be twice) but I truly feel like I was told by the spirit just moments before Kamberlie disappeared to "get a life jacket on her." Being involved in a grief group- I have met a lot of people from all walks of life who have lost loved ones... but not like me. They have lost them by cancer, by natural reasons, by age, but not by choice. I have struggled with feeling for a long time, that I could have prevented it- if I had only listened. Yes, I did tell her to get her life jacket on, but I didn't take the 2 minutes to do it myself. And I kick myself every single day because of that poor choice that I made at that moment. Austin disagrees with me completely! He says he knows that it was her time to go- I can't wait for the day that I too can feel 100 percent surety that it was not me failing to follow the prompting that I was given- and that it was truly her time to return to our Father in Heaven. <br /><br />*please, just pray for me*<br /><br />Happier days are sure to come... thanks for letting me ramble. :)<br /><br />I know my hurt will always be a part of me, but I also know it can weaken in time by completely turning my trust over to my Savior. I am grateful for the knowledge I have that He can heal all things... I just need to practice that more!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-61004236921588469232010-03-21T19:24:00.002-06:002010-03-21T19:27:33.864-06:00Kenzlie's Baby Blessing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">We will be blessing Kenzlie next Sunday March 28th @ 9:00 am. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Everyone is welcome to come.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> The address is 3364 W. 11400 So. South Jordan, UT 84095. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">We will be staying for the three hour block. There will be light refreshments at our home at noon. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">We would love to see you! </span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
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</span></div>Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-25183070065815000102010-03-07T14:21:00.011-07:002016-01-07T16:02:02.863-07:00Nightmare/Miracle/Blessing (Kamberlie)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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It has been almost 2 and 1/2 years since our sweet 3 year old Kamberlie drowned at Lake Powell. My emotions have never allowed me to write the complete story until now. Well, at least I am going to attempt to tell the whole story. It's late and I assume that I will write for the remainder of the night. My mind was racing from 11:30 pm until 1:30 pm. Today being February 1st 2010. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and knew that I needed to capture the emotions & memories that would not leave my mind. It's interesting that all of these thoughts have come since the arrival of Kenzlie. My emotions are so crazy. I feel like such a women. LOL. So here I am writing in the middle of the night to share with all who care to read the nightmare/miracle/blessing that we have experienced. Feel free to share our story with others if you feel that our experience might in some way help heal a broken heart.<br />
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Our hearts have been crushed and broken beyond human repair. Kim & I decided that it would be very selfish to hide behind our tragedy and so here we are exposing our inner most thoughts & emotions. So please bear with us. Our first desire when we started to write our feelings was to help us and our immediate family & our close friends. Since then we have opened up our blog for all to read. We realize that this may cause others to know us a little too well or feel that we need some self pity. On the contrary, we do not want people to feel sorry for us. Everyone has trials that they need to overcome. We are just a little family hoping that we might change or help the broken hearted.<br />
What we have to share goes far beyond the natural man and I would be foolish to ever think that we have made it this far on our own. I will start out by telling all within the sound of my voice that there is a God that loved me & you so much that he would send His only begotten son to die for us. I can only begin to imagine what that felt like for our Heavenly Father, as he willingly & lovingly, for our behalf, watched his son feel and suffer, not only the sins of all mankind, but all of the pains be it emotional, physical, mental, & spiritual. I KNOW THAT JESUS CHRIST DIED FOR ME! I know that without Him I would not be able to go on without my 2nd born little child. Losing a child in any fashion will kill you to to the inner most core. With that being said here is our story that has forever shaped our family.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjomC6l6mYG8ctJxT4b4ZB-uLiqqV2mSK-M-D3d7WnyzaXv2u5-30-_MNC74-RdcutBe9eJjUvvISiAu7LZWxF9u1jNgytrnOLdKQVpL8K9BZ80J6y2kofr0KM0_asfCPxf2hnmvCcmjj0/s1600/001+(116).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjomC6l6mYG8ctJxT4b4ZB-uLiqqV2mSK-M-D3d7WnyzaXv2u5-30-_MNC74-RdcutBe9eJjUvvISiAu7LZWxF9u1jNgytrnOLdKQVpL8K9BZ80J6y2kofr0KM0_asfCPxf2hnmvCcmjj0/s400/001+(116).jpg" width="400" /></a>On Thursday October 5th 2007, our family was on our way to Lake Powell. We loved it there. It was a place that we knew we could go and develop family relations. It was a place to relax and play hard all at the same time. It was something we looked forward to every few months while the weather was good. We were so excited to take our new boat out for the first time to Lake Powell. My parents were so nice and offered to take Stockton since he was almost two years old. Those of you who know our kids would agree that this was a huge favor to take one of our kids. This was an enormous help for us. Those of you who have little children know how difficult they can be especially at a place like Lake Powell. So we were especially excited to be able to spend time with Kamberlie who was three and Staley who was four at the time. My parents arrived at our house right before we were to leave. They had even talked about coming to Lake Powell in a few days and would of course bring Stockton along. That made it even better to know that our little guy would be able to join us and we would have extra help there at Lake Powell with the kids. The best part was knowing that we could get up super early and have great water and leave the kids on the house boat with Grandma. Thanks Mom. You're the best.<br />
Life was so good. Everything was so perfect. I really never knew adversity. Somehow I thought that I was too special or too great to endure hardships. I know, you are saying to yourself come on, did you really feel that way? The answer is yes! I'm so sorry that I felt that way but I did. I had escaped death and serious injury not just once or twice in my little life. I hope that this allows you to understand a little better about me and the state of mind that I was in. Now, don't get me wrong, I was super churchy. I tried my best to do and be my best at all times. I really got involved in other peoples’ lives to help out in anyway that I could. If you were to ask most people about Kim & I they would probably tell you that we were good, down to earth people, trying to live a life of service. Sometimes too much service, Kim would say, if I wasn't spending enough time with the family while trying to take care of everyone else. Well, needless to say the next couple of years would be ones of great sorrow and tribulation. For the first time in my life I would be the one needing love & support. I had always given love and support to others and yet I was lacking one very important element. I can truly say that I was not able to fully empathize with people and their trials. I feel so ashamed to admit that on many occasions I would quietly in my mind tell myself, as I watched others in their trials, enough is enough and you need to get over it. How crude! How insensitive! Yet looking back and really never having to go through adversity at all, can you blame me? Yes. You can blame me! The real special person is one that can empathize with out having to experience the trial. I was not one of those persons. I was and am still very young and inexperienced but that is still no excuse.<br />
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Back to our story. We were going to take Kamberlie & Staley as well as Teresa (my sister) with us. As we were all packed and just about ready to get into the Yukon to leave, I remember very clearly and distinctly my Dad (Craig Binks) grabbing Kamberlie and asking her to stay with Grandma & Grandpa. She emphatically declined. A few moments passed and again the question was posed, "Kamberlie, please stay with Grandpa." "No Grandpa. I do not want to go with you," she uttered with a slight glare. My heart aches knowing that the last words that my parents—her grandparents—had to hear was one of an offer declined to spend time with them.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHv1T6QuKLwScm7hnxZCq9pilFcVUEJXdq08EjIiu8iZ61f5jJFXcMwuuoX-AAIK0ivpR2Vz-EqNqSAbgCCYocxsKDIhvXLOUoJw4QJ-9nLs7ZprWX2JgeD66-Qx746tsRe5eKAydBu_s/s1600/001+(248).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHv1T6QuKLwScm7hnxZCq9pilFcVUEJXdq08EjIiu8iZ61f5jJFXcMwuuoX-AAIK0ivpR2Vz-EqNqSAbgCCYocxsKDIhvXLOUoJw4QJ-9nLs7ZprWX2JgeD66-Qx746tsRe5eKAydBu_s/s320/001+(248).jpg" /></a>Many times we are so caught up in our own grief and sorrow that we forget that other loved ones are hurting just as bad or more than we are and yet somehow too much of the time is focused on ourselves that we miss the opportunity to be there for someone else. I now look back and can see through different eyes just how difficult it was for my parents and especially my dad to deal with her loss in this way. Although, at the expense of my parents, there is great significance in this little part of the story: Kamberlie never turned down offers to go with Grandma & Grandpa Binks or Parry. She loved them so much and wanted to be with them at every chance. It was truly something special to hear Kamberlie talk about the Binks & Parry grandparents. We were a little worried that she might want to go live with them some day. Lol. So you can see how heart broken & crushed her grandparents (Binks) were, learning about their only girl grandchild, having to leave this life so quick & early.<br />
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It was generous of my parents to take our youngest; Stockton was enough of a challenge to watch. Now my Dad was offering to take Kamberlie as well. Kim & I first thought “Oh no Dad don't take on more. We will be alright.” He insisted that this was okay as long as she wanted to go with him. Again Kamberlie said, "No way, I'm going with Mommy & Daddy." This was a shock to all of us. Looking back I thank my Heavenly Father so much that He allowed us as her parents the opportunity to spend her final hours with us.<br />
Now, the previous two weeks were truly amazing. Kamberlie had been saying her goodbyes to us and we didn't even realize it. She was as perfect as a child could be during those final two weeks before Lake Powell. She listened to every word that Mommy & Daddy said. She showed so much love to us and to Staley & Stockton. In fact I believe the reason it has been so hard on Staley is because of how close he grew to her in those final days. It was an absolute miracle sent from on high. Kim & I were talking that week and commenting on how different Kamberlie was. How she had turned into such an angel. It was just too good to be true. What had we done as parents to have made such an impact in her behavior? You see, if you didn't know Kamberlie, she was a spunk to say the least. She was in control of every situation. You name the place and time and all the kids would follow her lead. But something was different that week and we had just thought we finally figured out how to be good parents and we had figured the little mischievous girl out.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9r4bK8_su0GQkmCfgCrQAwNGAiRocxY8YGvnuV2DFCw_kWyf3giPyc0ywGYGqcmWjKQ6KoE1sG-jZq9jsxozFGMxsRitrld2MZvcj4vItugzmqWVRTFyDJ7y_MsepOqB3KqQY6-tS4JY/s1600/001+(225).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9r4bK8_su0GQkmCfgCrQAwNGAiRocxY8YGvnuV2DFCw_kWyf3giPyc0ywGYGqcmWjKQ6KoE1sG-jZq9jsxozFGMxsRitrld2MZvcj4vItugzmqWVRTFyDJ7y_MsepOqB3KqQY6-tS4JY/s320/001+(225).jpg" /></a><br />
This is yet one more chance for me to point out just how merciful our Heavenly Father is. Here is a little girl that I know in her mind at the time did not know that it was her time to die. Her Heavenly Father knew and showed such tender mercies to us in her final days. Those memories of how she acted are invaluable to us. I can't tell you in words how grateful we are. If you don't believe in God, I beg of you to give Him a chance. I hope and pray that you might feel as I am feeling right now just how much He loves each and every one of us. I know that God loves me. It is so wonderful to have that assurance. If only the world could feel that way. We would do things a lot different as a society. From the beginning of days God knew how long Kamberlie would be here on earth. He knew exactly what we needed from her and he knew just how long to keep her here so that she would have just enough time to take her little heart and break a little piece of it into so many people's lives. God knows! He just does! Believe me, I know! People, family, friends, all who needed this little angel to touch their lives, not to mention all that would grow and better themselves after learning about her. I call her a little angel but those of you who got the glare from her wouldn't have called her that just yet. She wasn't afraid to speak her mind or tell you what you maybe didn't want to hear. Nonetheless she had such an infectious way about her. One that I don't know how to duplicate. It was so neat to see her just take charge of every situation and involve everyone at such a young age. It was truly amazing. There is no wonder why Heavenly Father needed her to do a great work on the other side of the veil. We are so proud of what she was able to accomplish before she came to this earth to ensure her exaltation. Kamberlie was a Mommy's girl on the surface but Daddy had a real neat bond with her. One that I miss and long for. So much so that most of you know that we were willing to have boy after boy after boy until we got another little girl. Not to replace Kamberlie but to try to have just a little bit of what we were missing. We were so convinced that Kenzlie was a boy. Another story for another time. It's so good to have another girl in the house. I told Kim when we were first married that I would be okay to have just boys. I'm sure glad Heavenly Father didn't give me what I wanted. Sometimes what we think we want or need is so far off from what He knows that we need. We can't ever get discouraged if we don't receive the answers to our prayers that we want. Be patient and realize that God is shaping us before our very eyes. Let Him do a marvelous work, which includes us if we will let Him.<br />
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You see, when everyone was asleep, Kamberlie knew that she could come out of her bed, come out into the family room, & watch sports with me. Mommy didn't know this and if she did she wouldn't approve so it was our little secret. I tried to get my other boys interested but they wouldn't do it so I had to spoil Kamberlie since she supported me in my sports. As everyone was asleep, we would go to the freezer and eat ice cream and all sorts of good stuff. Most of the time she would fall asleep but she just wanted to be with me. It just made me smile inside as big as the Grand Canyon. I was so in love! That little girl had won me over a million times and again. I was the luckiest Dad in the world. I was invincible and I loved it. When the sporting event was over I would take her into bed, stare at her, and just thank my Heavenly Father for sending such an amazing spirit into our home. My heart was so full. Sometimes I would just kneel beside her and pray and think why. Why am I so blessed? Seriously, what did I do to deserve my wonderful kids. She was the talk everywhere we would go. This was a great concern for Kim & I. :) We were worried that Staley & Stockton wouldn't get enough attention. It was very rare that someone wouldn't comment on how cute or adorable she was. Her personality was absolutely amazing. Let's just say that I was and was not looking forward to the teenage years all at the same time. How do you like that Kim? I do but I don't! (Inside joke) Anyway that was my little Kamberlie.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxGRZtFVfr9Oz4_7Eo-frYnOy8STmL7KRNiPgSEwr4Kw6Q3E9hFA6AAHdZ1KyC9eJWou0pXkEDQAWXDgdsQbFeF0ZLe6lOgvHUL5hZtXXYmxZUHXsHOmMcnfMVH6xNqKeSJYXQhrnPY1k/s1600/001+(171).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxGRZtFVfr9Oz4_7Eo-frYnOy8STmL7KRNiPgSEwr4Kw6Q3E9hFA6AAHdZ1KyC9eJWou0pXkEDQAWXDgdsQbFeF0ZLe6lOgvHUL5hZtXXYmxZUHXsHOmMcnfMVH6xNqKeSJYXQhrnPY1k/s320/001+(171).jpg" /></a>We had a bond that I just didn't have with my other kids. Staley was too in love with himself and his mother. Stockton I'm sure was too in love with himself but he was too young to realize it. LOL. Oh how I miss my sweet Kamberlie. My heart aches & I long to be able to be with her again. I am so so so amazingly grateful that Jesus Christ suffered for me. I know that because of what He did I will be able to live with her again as long as I do my part here on earth. I never knew what it meant to soak a pillow with tears until after she died. I never knew how it felt to plead, literally plead for so much help after she left this world. I really never knew what pain was. I never knew what sorrow or grief even meant. I didn't know that it was possible to hurt so much. I didn't know at all what others have had to go through since the beginning of time. I feel so honored to be her Daddy. I really do. I'm not just saying that because she died. I truly feel & know that she was chosen from on high to do a work that would not only affect our family but many others as well. She came to this earth and fulfilled her mission. She has been missed greatly. No one knows quite how it feels unless you've been through it.<br />
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My Dad made an interesting comment a few months following her death. When I was nine years old my youngest brother Colby was born. He lived only six months due to multiple complications. I remember the day my Dad came home from the hospital and got out the video camera. He said that we needed to have a family talk. I wasn't stupid. I knew. I knew that my special little brother had died and I was not happy about it. Tears began to fall from my face. I had a bond with my little brother. It was a special bond since I knew that he would have many challenges growing up. His body would not function, he would be in a wheelchair, he would need to have constant help for the rest of his life. I would get home from school and look forward to the opportunity to hold his little crippled body in my arms. I never thought that he wouldn't make it. The thing that made him so special to me is despite all of his physical challenges his mind was perfect. So I would be able to really get to know & talk to him. I imagined the day when I would come home from school and be able to push him around the block knowing that he would be anxious to get out of the house. Anyway as the camera started, we were in the basement, the camera was in the North East part of the family room on a brown octagon coffee table, recording our reaction to the news that my Dad thought we didn't know. Well I cried and cried that night, it was hard for a little nine year old boy to handle that. I had no idea what my parents were going through. Now, back to what my Dad told me. He said, "As hard as it was to lose Colby, this is so much harder to lose Kamberlie and I'm her Grandpa." Needless to say that hit me pretty hard. I was on the phone with him at the time and tears were running down my face. You see, I went through Colby dying when I was nine years old and never took any thought all the time I was growing up as to what my parents were feeling. I just ignorantly assumed that I, as a nine year old boy, was grieving the same as my parents.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6vPr3D-itDlusCQKNdtJ-QQevX7dr3Kg93UcLOUvKG5CM5SvTq32JXkVEyVfD8zUTCJk9YeMjsIB-5-GCMnNArmChLN4RJeh_LcoYarlBAW-SA3k_0t7RzZl5cuXi6LtP9X7FouHCFWA/s1600/001+(187).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6vPr3D-itDlusCQKNdtJ-QQevX7dr3Kg93UcLOUvKG5CM5SvTq32JXkVEyVfD8zUTCJk9YeMjsIB-5-GCMnNArmChLN4RJeh_LcoYarlBAW-SA3k_0t7RzZl5cuXi6LtP9X7FouHCFWA/s320/001+(187).jpg" /></a>I never understood the significance of what my Dad was going through until Kamberlie. But as you can see, in each case, although very different situations, Heavenly Father takes us under his wing. As my father & mother were at the hospital visiting Colby the day that he died, they noticed that he was extremely outgoing. His tongue was being utilized for the first time in a very active manner. He was wide awake and giving it everything he could to say goodbye that day. God knew that it was his time to go. God knew how to succor his children. My Father placed his hands upon Colby's head to give him a priesthood blessing. This is the authority to act in God's name. As he was giving that blessing he was told by a higher power to say, "Colby if it is your time to go then we understand and can accept that." Just then, even as he spoke those words, Colby died. He was waiting to leave this life but wanted my parents to follow God's will, not theirs. That is so hard to do. Our will vs. God's will. Sometimes we think that we know what is best for us. News flash everyone, we do not and I say that with all the energy of my soul, we do not know what is best for us! God knows! He knows! If we will learn to know what God's will is, we will never be led astray and we will make it back to His presence. My Dad's comment of how losing Kamberlie was more painful than losing Colby took me back quite a bit. He lost his son just like I lost my daughter.<br />
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I can't tell you exactly why Kamberlie was able to leave such a mark on so many people but she did and those of you who never met her need to understand somewhat what kind of impact she had on our lives so that you will better be able to understand the rest of the story.<br />
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So back to being at home ready to leave for Lake Powell. Kamberlie insisted on going with us and not staying back with Grandma & Grandpa. After she had died, with tears in his eyes, my Dad said if only she would have just come with us. I cut him off before he could finish because I knew where he was going. I looked at him and said without regret," Dad, it was her time to go. God has let me know that. Just like you knew with Colby. If she had stayed back with you then Kim & I would have said our good byes that day and never seen her again in this life." It was our privilege to have her until the very end. She had her choice. We did not force her to come to Lake Powell with us. Every other time she would have chosen to go with Grandpa. Again, Heavenly Father knew what was about to happen and Kamberlie was supposed to come with us. He knows, no exceptions!<br />
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We arrived at Lake Powell on Friday night (October 5th) The weather Saturday was horrible. We could not do anything on the water. We had to stay on the house boat. This is also very important for you to understand. God was in the driver’s seat the whole time. We had not been in the ward for too long when we went to Lake Powell. We didn't know too many people in the new ward. At the same time that we were there in our houseboat there were some people from our ward in another houseboat as well. JD & Cindy Dawson, Josh & Alicia Holmgren, Bryce & Jenny Morris, were there. The part that gives me chills every time I think about it is that JD never stays in the slip, but because of the nasty weather they did not pull the house boat out this time. Again, some might call it a coincidence but I will tell you with much boldness that it was not. We needed them there more than they will ever realize.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOpqmmGhy78fCScL0s5TAh5Tmrgh33e2WPN7BeIfVH89J2hqocG6J7csapkrOMZUuuED7Fhjavg2u_MDxZJnjDWDMiU6seKWnKRxGB-uwdz-kE1wDUUeN4ra85XMrlutyN6Covzi5bA4E/s1600/001+(77).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOpqmmGhy78fCScL0s5TAh5Tmrgh33e2WPN7BeIfVH89J2hqocG6J7csapkrOMZUuuED7Fhjavg2u_MDxZJnjDWDMiU6seKWnKRxGB-uwdz-kE1wDUUeN4ra85XMrlutyN6Covzi5bA4E/s320/001+(77).JPG" /></a>Sunday arrived and the weather was fabulous. Since we don't get in the water on Sunday it was another day of relaxing in the houseboat. We believe that Sunday is the Lord's day and a day of rest so even though the weather was awesome we held firm to our commitment to the Lord and didn't go out on the water. Imagine that! The best weather on a Sunday. :) So we stayed in the house boat all day.<br />
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Then that dreadful Monday—October 8th, 2007—arrived. This would be the day that would forever change not only us but family & friends, and all who were involved. At least I would hope so. The weather was good. Normally we would get up bright & early to get the glass and we would have other people there to watch the kids, but my parents, who had mentioned that they would most likely come down and bring Stockton, had a change of plans and were not going to make it. We got up early and went out on the water. Since my parents were not there we got Staley & Kamberlie out of bed earlier than usual. Bryce was the only one that would wake up early to go out with us and so we went out. That would be the last time that Kamberlie would ride in our boat or any boat for that matter.<br />
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I can't remember the time exactly, but Kim & I were on the boat docked next to the house boat getting it ready to take out. Kamberlie & Staley were in sight. Kim yelled out a few times to get their life jackets on. We have received much criticism about that. Hello! Don't you think that losing a daughter is enough of a lesson! It's super easy for someone on the outside to say, "what an idiot." or "Put on a life jacket and all of this would have been avoided." That is why I am so glad to have the knowledge that I have. I know without a doubt that it was her time to go. I'll say it again; God is in the driver’s seat. Should she have been wearing a life jacket? Of course! That goes without saying. I received assurance from on High very soon after she drowned that Kamberlie dying could not have been avoided. You don't know how hard and long it was for Kim to forgive herself for that. It took Kim a little more time to feel the same way. Rightfully so! A Mother's bond with her child always goes much deeper that a Fathers.<br />
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As Kim & I were on the boat we could hear little feet running in the house boat and then back on the dock. Back and forth they played. Into the houseboat and then back onto the dock. I turned on the air pump to fill up a tube and it was loud. A few seconds went by and Staley ran out on the dock but Kamberlie was not following like before. I turned off the pump and said to Kim, "Where is Kamberlie?" I quickly jumped out of the boat & ran into the house boat and came back out. Nothing. Panic was an understatement at this point. It had only been seconds so she had to be close. You see, there is something that you need to understand about me. I have always been full of confidence. Some call it pride. I'm working on that. Any way, the best way that I can describe it with out misleading you too much is, as I alluded to before, I felt I was invincible. I really did. I had had some near death experiences growing up. I honestly thought that Kim, myself, and my kids would always be protected. Was this wrong? Yeah, Of course we are not invincible but somehow somewhere deep within I just always thought that I was too special for Heavenly Father to take me, my wife, or one of my children away. I don't know of any other way to explain it. I'm sorry that I felt, key word, felt that way.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEhgmdtE3o9m2vx5zheh7z2RfTt2R2gxA3Esq8OEhbypV4LzR6UpqNCl0GvuLAzJNuX9n-kt0f-NOf4HSmHHMyP5gBPY390NgUFFL0IjfHvY5hYYFP4MX05kmMSy7AFZyWNGFVbUaCs4I/s1600/001+(13).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEhgmdtE3o9m2vx5zheh7z2RfTt2R2gxA3Esq8OEhbypV4LzR6UpqNCl0GvuLAzJNuX9n-kt0f-NOf4HSmHHMyP5gBPY390NgUFFL0IjfHvY5hYYFP4MX05kmMSy7AFZyWNGFVbUaCs4I/s320/001+(13).jpg" /></a>We turned everything upside down looking for her to no avail. My mind began to take me where I did not want it to go. I kept repeating the words, "No, Please no, this is not happening!" I ran around the house boat looking in the mucky water. Nothing. I sprinted up to the top of the houseboat. I called out for my little girl. I wept as I called for her. Too much time had now passed. I was praying that she was hiding or playing a game. I ran down the dock to JD's house boat and asked if they had seen Kamberlie. "No" was their reply. I ran back to the house boat and jumped into the water. Bryce, JD, & Josh followed me back to our houseboat. They were already in the water after I had come up to the surface to catch my breath for the first time. As I held my breath to go under water the only thing that brought me back to the surface is to get air to go back down. Otherwise I really didn't care if I came back up or not. I had lost the love of my life. Where was she? I pleaded to God. “Please God, Help me! Help me find her!” I continued to dive down with no avail. The water was so mucky. I was desperate. I didn't know if or where she had fallen in the water but each time I would dive down with my eyes so wide open hoping that the deeper I went down the greater the chance for some miracle, that I might see a hand or foot. Nothing again. As I would come up each time I would get mad at myself for not being able to hold my breath longer or go down deeper. I would say to myself “This is my daughter, why can't I find her?”<br />
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After numerous attempts in the water I got out to search the houseboat again. I thought maybe by some small miracle she had fallen asleep somewhere. Obviously looking back there wasn't enough time for her to fall asleep but in the moment of panic you just try to think of any and all possibilities. Still nothing. I believe Alicia Holmgren phoned for help. The search began on other houseboats. Maybe she was hiding there. Things were not looking good. I pleaded with God for a miracle. My soul was tormented and I didn't know what to do. I told God that I would do anything to get her back. “Take me, let me die,” I pleaded with God in my mind as I raced to find her. As time passed we knew things were not looking good.<br />
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JD Dawson, Bryce Morris, & Josh Holmgren offered to give Kim & I a priesthood blessing. Again as I had mentioned earlier this is God's authority to act in his name. It's very important that the person giving the blessing act accordingly. We don't ask for things that go against God's will. It is very difficult to make sure that the person giving the blessing is in tune enough with the Holy Spirit to give a blessing according to His will and not ours. JD went out on the dock near the house boat. Kim was lying there curled up in a ball. JD scooped her literally lifeless body and carried her into the houseboat and set her down on the chair. As calmly as I could I, with the others, placed my hands upon Kim's head and I administered a blessing to her. I don't recall what was said but the Lord allowed me enough calmness to give her the blessing that she needed. Those that were present mentioned how powerful of a blessing it was. I wish that I could remember all that was said but I did not promise her that Kamberlie would be found alive but I did say that the Lord knew what was best for us and would some how take care of us. I then was given a blessing by Josh Holmgren. I just can't remember anything that was said. Sorry guys I just wasn't doing so hot.<br />
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The search continued. We searched up and down every houseboat on that dock. It was now time that we needed to call family and let them know the horrific news. I will never forget the first call that I made. It was to my Dad. I said in a very solemn, calm, desperate, raspy, slow & scared voice with tears running down both cheeks, "Dad Kamberlie is missing." I will never forget what he uttered and how I felt when he said it. The best way to describe it is when he spoke it was as if he had swallowed something. It was caught in his throat. His voice was slightly raspy, trembling, & choked up all together in one motion. He said, with much emotion, pain, & sorrow, “OOOH NOOO.” Tears were running down my face and I knew at that moment he had began to feel what we had been feeling for the last hour or so. I really don't know how long it was before I called. It’s all a hellish blur.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYVne69Mz49XzGaNavZ-6cZorH_l_UGl8Oz3eG1p4jpsiABlAQzrTX6gYsM8qj68euMCnf15pxa_hMgey143auPl4zSfBYzLKAlEsnkKlmQnZjzKXlis40IzDBqzIG8eUtuwGaMYDqQCg/s1600/001+(55).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYVne69Mz49XzGaNavZ-6cZorH_l_UGl8Oz3eG1p4jpsiABlAQzrTX6gYsM8qj68euMCnf15pxa_hMgey143auPl4zSfBYzLKAlEsnkKlmQnZjzKXlis40IzDBqzIG8eUtuwGaMYDqQCg/s320/001+(55).JPG" /></a><br />
We had family support within minutes it seemed. Ron & Lois Parry (Kim's parents) were graciously offered a private plane by EK Bailey where he worked. Thank you to Brent, you will never really understand how much that meant to Kim and I. What you did in my estimation deserves a magnitude of blessing from on High. Thank you for your generosity. May God bless you over & over for allowing us such a blessing. My parents went over to the West Jordan airport and hired a pilot to fly them to Lake Powell. It was a small little plane, one that my Dad would not normally dare to fly on except in such dire circumstances. It was so nice to have our parents with us that treacherous day. It was so hard. I just don't know how to explain it. That night was miserable to say the least.<br />
We met search and rescue that day. They had professional divers come but still to no avail. The main guy for search and rescue after about an hour of diving said that they would continue the search in the morning. This was devastating to us. He pulled me aside and said, "Hey man if she is in the water there is no way that she is still alive." I told him that I realized that. It had been several hours. Let me take a minute to tell you what hell is like. If for nothing more, take my word for it, if this is hell then please do everything in your power to be good. A normal person can only take on that kind of pain and suffering for a short period of time without going absolutely insane or without help from a higher power. I know what it feels like to be up all night bawling. I know what it feels like to lay there and wonder where my daughter is. I know what it feels like to picture my daughter underwater calling out for Daddy, and no one coming to rescue her. I know what it feels like to imagine Kamberlie wanting so bad to yell for her Daddy, and yet there is no air. I know what it feels like to wonder how could I let my daughter suffer. I know what it feels like to wonder just how long she was alive while sinking. I know what it feels like to lay next to my wife and just hold her all night because she was inconsolable. I know what it feels like to have pits in my stomach that would not leave. I know what it feels like to want to die in her place. I know what it feels like to have my wife so heartbroken that nothing could take her pain away at the time. I know what it feels like to plead and plead and plead with God that she would somehow be okay. I know what it feels like to repeat over & over again “NO NO NO this is not happening.” I know what it feels like to dive into the water and not want to come up. I know what it feels like to run & run looking, searching, praying that we would find her alive. I know what it feels like to hear someone tell the police that they thought they saw Kamberlie being taken away against her will. I know what it feels like to do nothing but wait day after day after day for them to find her. I know what it feels like to see my wife die physically & emotionally. I know what it feels like to see her pain and it just killed me. I know what it feels like to pray for answers and not get them when I want. I know what it feels like to be on the Lord's time table. I know what it feels like to hope & pray and beg for a miracle. I know what it feels like to not be consoled. I know what it feels like to wait for four days to find out her fate. I know what it feels like to pace back and forth day after day with no answers. I know what it feels like to lose a child. I know what it feels like to lose my little Kamberlie.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiqrFajX10-pRL6kcQw9inMaJph4XGkSljn4KZrfRcJm1V3bbXa7lie0DB3ogQPOQM6zeTLS-vKszpVrnf5GPnwDRUkumZskSchbJGLaLb-oAgM-VjzgtSF1Z7Crc_dkYzxhg3UxqSVBU/s1600/001+(23).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiqrFajX10-pRL6kcQw9inMaJph4XGkSljn4KZrfRcJm1V3bbXa7lie0DB3ogQPOQM6zeTLS-vKszpVrnf5GPnwDRUkumZskSchbJGLaLb-oAgM-VjzgtSF1Z7Crc_dkYzxhg3UxqSVBU/s320/001+(23).jpg" /></a>Why do I go into so much detail? Because it hurt so bad and so deep that there could only be one way out of this. I tell you this because many people hurt like I did. I tell you this because God loves me as much as he does you and he provided a way to help us heal. God sent his only begotten son, even Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world, to come to this earth and die for Kamberlie, for me, & for you. The atonement is real! I will never deny it. It has been a long 2+ years I will admit, but we could not be where we are today with out the atonement. Although I wish that the healing could be immediate, that is not God's way. He has to allow us to go through as much as we can on our own. Then the miracle of the atonement takes the rest from off our backs. Oh how I love my Savior. How else can I say it? Whatever trials we are asked to go through, Jesus Christ is right there waiting for us to ask Heavenly Father for help. There is no problem too big or too small to get the help we need.<br />
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You see, Kim & I made a decision a long time ago that what ever trials we would need to go through (We never thought that we would lose a child) that we would never pose the question of “Why God? Why would you do this to us? How could you?” We agreed that we would accept God's will and seek his help in our adversity. Well now was the test of our faith. I made up my mind in the 5th grade that I would never do drugs, smoke, or drink. That was easy. If someone asked me to do one of those things I politely declined. But now my faith was going to be tested more than I had ever imagined. In a special blessing that I was given as a teenager I was told that I would come to crossroads in my life and that I would need to ponder & pray at those critical times in my life. If this wasn't a crossroad then I don't know what is. The big question was, could I indeed keep my promise to the Lord that I would accept His will in all things? So far so good. Not once, and I'm not patting myself on the back, but not once did Kim or I say “Why?!” Not once! All we did was plead for help that we could get through this hell together.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqwD3fiTBcDsSfcAR6Cb-4J7wQ9MEW3oQyMQ_2vBUYAPjyaJSrtLHTDZDbGwLb0g_LnpBBUE3h9mmhrIgVmlTz5p0Dxy2bXVQiEfCn8WH7T6NXE_nypmcuaK4cepCzPNHtalQbnAsSOxk/s1600/001+(37).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqwD3fiTBcDsSfcAR6Cb-4J7wQ9MEW3oQyMQ_2vBUYAPjyaJSrtLHTDZDbGwLb0g_LnpBBUE3h9mmhrIgVmlTz5p0Dxy2bXVQiEfCn8WH7T6NXE_nypmcuaK4cepCzPNHtalQbnAsSOxk/s320/001+(37).jpg" /></a>Onto dreadful day number two. We made it through the night with little or no sleep at all. We looked horrendous. The search & rescue team arrived. They searched all day directly by the houseboat. Nothing. The day was long. We prayed, pondered, paced, cried, & the day was still not over. Finally the day was coming to a close and now we had to endure another night. Kim was not eating. She looked horrible. Please don't let me have another night like that. It was torture enough that our daughter was missing, now I had to live through a literally dying wife. Day three they brought in a search dog. We had to provide clothing of Kamberlie's so that the dog could pick up her scent. They told us that the dog followed her scent all around our house boat but also to the edge of the dock and he even jumped into the water to follow her scent. This could not be. There is no way in that amount of time that she was missing that she could have went all the way down to the other end of the dock. The investigator posed the question like this. Well, sometimes you think that is was only a few seconds or even minutes but is there a chance that it was five or ten minutes? Kim & I emphatically said no. Not a chance. We know how long it was and there is no way that she is down there by that part of the dock. Our opinion didn't matter. As far as they were concerned the dog picked up the scent at the end of the dock and that is where they would search for her that day. That is where they spent the entire day looking, right by that spot. We watched all that day and then when night came we watched them clean up their stuff and leave for the night. We knew that if she was in the water (and we were having some doubts by now) that she would have fallen right by the house boat. We were beginning to wonder if there was some possible way that she was not in the water. This was, of course, false hope, for deep down inside we knew that that would be impossible. For me this was a night of short segments of sleep being awakened by either my tears or Kim's. That is so hard to do by the way. To wake up because the bed is slightly shaking and find that Kim or I would just be bawling. You couldn't keep your body still. Those kinds of sobs couldn’t be kept to ourselves, inevitable one of us would wake the other with our trembling. She was trying to be quiet but just couldn't. We would lay there curled up in a ball, having no way to be comforted. I would put my arm around her but how could I console her in such a case? My heart was broken twice. Once by my little girl and the other by my wife. I wondered if she would ever be the same. I wouldn't blame her if she wasn't.<br />
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I do need to say now though that Kim is an inspiration to not only me but all who know her. She is absolutely amazing. She has surpassed all expectations. She has shown all of us just how to utilize the atonement. I thank her so much for allowing Christ to take over and help her heal. Don't get me wrong, Kim still hurts like crazy for her baby, but it is a miracle to be a witness of God's power right here in our own home.<br />
By now word had spread and the media wanted interviews. Everyone said don't talk to the media. They will distort the story. They are out to sell news and will not be looking out for your best interest. I allowed everyone to state their opinion but at the end of the day I just felt that I needed to talk to them. I didn't know why I would have this prompting but I did and I heeded it. So I did some phone interviews.<br />
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Day number four. This day was different in that they brought in some better equipment and another rescue team. I would like to thank the rescue team for finding our little girl. They assured us that they would not leave until she was found. I don't know if I ever had the chance to thank them: Thank you so much for helping us out so much. They were now searching directly around the houseboat again. To be honest I was so relieved that she was not found at the end of the dock. I was so sure that she could not have made it that far and yet I began to doubt myself because of what the experts were saying. It was a very calm feeling on day number four. I was beginning to feel the affects of the atonement. I was also so glad to see them searching by our house boat again.<br />
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I believe it was early afternoon when a good friend of mine, Rob Derho, mentioned that he was there at Lake Powell. He said that he had a hotel room. He had brought us breakfast that morning. I love that guy. He has an amazing story of his own. Ask him sometime or call him out and make him blog about it. Anyway he offered his hotel room and I accepted. We were just stuffed in that houseboat. I needed to take a walk anyway. We went up to his room and showered, shaved, and just got cleaned up. After a few hours up there I suddenly had a strong urge to get back to the houseboat. A feeling that is difficult to explain, a little antsy maybe. Anxious you could say. So we left the hotel and headed down for the houseboat. My Dad called me on my cell as I was almost back and said to come back, the search and rescue wanted to see me. I knew that they had located her even though he wouldn't say. I could just feel it. By then I had this overwhelming feeling that it was over, we could put this to bed, and that I could do this. I could make it. God would help me through this. We could have closure and begin to move forward instead of backward. It was an amazing feeling. I know with certainty that these feeling that had began to surface were from none other than a loving Heavenly Father who allowed me to walk until I could not walk any more. Those feelings were so needed at that given time. I really don't think I could have gone another day. The Lord stepped in and I am so grateful for that. I am just awe strucked as I look back and see just how involved the Lord was in all of this. And yet He didn't just allow us immediate comfort & relief. It was a process. The atonement is a process in each of our lives. For some the effects come sooner than later, for others they might seem immediate. What ever the case may be we must be patient and humbly wait while prayerfully asking for help. Help will come according to our faith. We have to want & ask for the help. We had been praying multiple times each day but the real answers and comfort came on day number four.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_ANL9NYkRQ2qpuWJYQ552uhUEbx9b5fhjYUGxS8dYsPaOOBnb-clx0UZMp3OKNOtbfkq76bIRD1YhT8rgFOMKBPYun9OyhEw6xp_UpJK24-WfvtTkh1K0nODM4QpuUeZYCo0MI5Yn-fY/s1600/001+(288).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_ANL9NYkRQ2qpuWJYQ552uhUEbx9b5fhjYUGxS8dYsPaOOBnb-clx0UZMp3OKNOtbfkq76bIRD1YhT8rgFOMKBPYun9OyhEw6xp_UpJK24-WfvtTkh1K0nODM4QpuUeZYCo0MI5Yn-fY/s400/001+(288).JPG" width="400" /></a>As we approached the houseboat they gathered the family together inside with the curtains closed. They told us that we may not want to see her since her body might not look so good after being in the water for that long. It took them about 30 minutes to bring her carefully up. As they worked outside of the house boat we were all inside anxiously waiting. There was a very special feeling in that little room. Kamberlie was there with out question. She was a witness to the heart felt testimonies that were borne. Each person was given an opportunity to speak their mind. There was great power as we spoke of sweet doctrine. We talked about the Plan of Salvation and what that meant to each of us. Hearts were softened and the Holy Ghost bore witness to these truths. I was very grateful at that moment to have most of our family present. Time passed so quickly and before we knew it they had laid her little body on the back of the house boat and came inside to tell us. I told everyone that I wanted to go out on the deck alone first. I went out there and knelt over her tiny corpse. I stroked her wet blonde hair and kissed her cold cheeks over & over. I didn't want to leave her side. But I had to find out from God if he would allow a miracle to take place. I then went into the back room and pleaded for a miracle. I am a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I have the priesthood which is the power of God to act in his name. This is the same power & authority that Jesus used to raise Lazarus from the dead and all of the other miracles that he performed. I asked with my whole soul if I could lay my hands upon her head and bring her back. I even told him that I would take her place if necessary, if he would grant me this desire. I had the faith necessary if he would allow it. I said to my Heavenly Father not my will but Thine be done. Then clear as day, the answer came. Everyday we were praying for a miracle. Everyday we were asking but no answer came until now. “No. No my son. It shall not be so, it is her time.” With tears in my eyes I said “okay, I accept Thy will and please help me and my family get through this. I know that we can't do it alone.”<br />
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I went back out on the deck and spent a few more sacred, precious moments with her. I told her that I prayed for a miracle and that it wasn't His will. I asked her to always be with us and to watch over us. We were going to need her help to get through this. Selfishly I could have stayed out there for hours but I was also wanted each of our family members present to feel what I was feeling by her side. It was as if she was patting me on the back and saying, "Daddy it's okay, I'm happy". It was very peaceful.<br />
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The search & rescue team cautioned us about looking at Kamberlie. They said that she might not look like the Kamberlie that you knew before and that maybe some of you might want to keep the image of Kamberlie before she drowned fresh in your minds. I then went back into the house boat and told everyone about my prayer and also told them of another tender mercy of God. I told them that her body was perfect. Everything about her was perfect. Her face was that of an angel. The water had not changed her appearance in the least. God gave us one last time to look upon her as she was before she drowned. It had been four days since we had seen her. Heavenly Father was so kind to allow us that special moment. So Kim & I went out alone together. This was a special time for us to share. Quite a sacred moment. That was so hard to see Kim weeping over her little daughter’s lifeless body. I was so happy to have found her and yet to see Kim's pain was excruciating. We allowed the grandparents to come out next, then our siblings, each taking a sacred moment to say goodbye to her physical body.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI4CWSHhFre0YsXxpw0A1ZgftZqM_d4WzHJOJzmXUwKkrBkqjW6BB59EwDaxnw3dtpOwKQY9dRJiEkfh3bAYCmcKWFy0RUs8CXg0ABYXuo3I0IXzcIprIsVGlTES6-7WYzywXY9KqnCak/s1600/001+(56).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI4CWSHhFre0YsXxpw0A1ZgftZqM_d4WzHJOJzmXUwKkrBkqjW6BB59EwDaxnw3dtpOwKQY9dRJiEkfh3bAYCmcKWFy0RUs8CXg0ABYXuo3I0IXzcIprIsVGlTES6-7WYzywXY9KqnCak/s320/001+(56).JPG" /></a>During this time that she was gone, Staley (4 yrs old at the time) knew that she was missing but he was still playing and having fun, probably thinking that she was just away for a bit. We debated if Staley should see her and we agreed that he should. My heart was crushed as finally her older brother realized just what had happened. He stepped out onto the deck with a smile on his face. Not melancholy at all. More of an attitude of a playful nature. Obviously not yet affected by her being missing. As soon as he saw her he gasped a deep breath and simultaneously backed away, being slightly scared and afraid. The slight smile on his face went blank and his eyes got wide. Just looking at him I knew that even as a four year old boy he finally knew that his best friend was gone. From that day on it has been a rough road for my little Staley. It's hard to see my wife in pain but now I’ve had to see on multiple occasions my little boy break down and ask me “why, why did she have to leave? Why did Heavenly Father need her? I need her. She is my sister and I miss her so much. Heavenly Father didn't need her I needed her!” How else can you explain to a little boy that Heavenly Father needed her now. To a little four year old boy that answer just wasn't enough. We have had many discussions since and he has come a long way. I'm so proud of him. Not many children have to endure such hardships like he has.<br />
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We didn't want to leave her while on the back of the boat. We wanted to just hold her in her little white shirt and wet jeans. This was my little girl. I wanted to just stay there for hours. Unfortunately search & rescue need to proceed with what they needed to do. Protocol was to take her back to Salt Lake City and have an autopsy done. That gave me the creeps that they were going to cut her open. It was hard to let her go. I asked if I could ride with her in their vehicle. They told me that it would not be a good idea. I was dreading the long drive home without my little girl. JD Dawson was just amazing. I had just met him and we had formed a great bond over all of this. He lined up a private jet for us to go home in. That was such a blessing. We arrived at the West Jordan airport, where there was a limo & flowers waiting for us. We got home to our whole yard in pink ribbons & heart felt notes. It was so wonderful to see so many people that wanted to help out in anyway that they could.<br />
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Now for those of you who have ever been discouraged with prayers or think that God doesn't hear or answer prayers I have to be the one to tell you otherwise. For starters, I pleaded with God that since we couldn't bring her back that He would please help us get through this. Not only were our prayers answered, but other people in the community were moved to help in ways that we didn't pray or ask for. From dinners, to donations, to private jets, and prayers, we were being watched over in our darkest hour.<br />
The next month was easy relative to the year that would follow. Let me make it very clear to all that read this. The clear and distinct impression came over me and I not only knew but felt thousands upon thousands of prayers in our behalf. It was truly amazing. That feeling of needing to talk to the media was very important. We needed those prayers. The ensuing months are the ones that were of greatest difficulty. Although people were still praying for us life continued for the masses that were following the story on the news. I then look back at why I had felt so strongly to talk to the media. We needed those prayers of more than just our family and friends. We got just that.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2goOTolSDnIRlQNiui1KxD7iVRArDniJQk4GEtijC71Ww9QTztuapnCBjTUczjgir39s9tVMpk3QuWUIM1URBkAOjq1H8xtUxk47siH8wPvFD9QB2kMLLNdslVYff7WjudIVUQSsGonU/s1600/001+(266).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2goOTolSDnIRlQNiui1KxD7iVRArDniJQk4GEtijC71Ww9QTztuapnCBjTUczjgir39s9tVMpk3QuWUIM1URBkAOjq1H8xtUxk47siH8wPvFD9QB2kMLLNdslVYff7WjudIVUQSsGonU/s320/001+(266).jpg" /></a>It's taken me two plus years to be able to write this experience down. I couldn't sleep and the memories just flooded in. I knew that I had to get up and write this, for how long I would be able to remember without writing them down, I don't know. I have however attempted to write my thoughts & feeling down on numerous other occasions but every time I tried I was overcome by my emotions & pain and could not do it. I have been writing for a majority of the night. I am so grateful that my Heavenly Father has given me the strength to write these thoughts & feelings down. I am so sorry if you were one of the people that made a donation, prayed, brought in dinner, helped plan the funeral, buy pink bears as a remembrance, or whatever you did, and didn't get a thank you. So I tell you now. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. You will never know just how much it meant to us. I know that Jesus Christ is real. He really did die for you and I that we might have comfort & relief in this life. There is a plan for all of us. Life is not just a series of events. I will tell you with all my heart that this life is the time to prepare to meet God as it says in the scriptures. What we do and how we act in this life will be a direct result of where we will go the life to come. There is life after death. I know this. It is not just a wish. I know that I will see Kamberlie again. It is through the great atonement of Jesus Christ that makes this possible. Those of you who have lost a loved one know what it feels like. I just hope and pray that you also know what it feels like to have the knowledge that you too can be with them again one day. Please feel free to contact us if there is anything that we can do to help you. We hope that through our trials & hardships that we might help bring peace & hope to all who read our story. Again please feel free to share our blog with those that are broken hearted or just need to be uplifted. I know how hard it is to heal but I testify that healing can come to all who will open the door for our Savior. He is knocking but can't come in unless we simply open the door.<br />
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Austin Cornell Binks </div>
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Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-32295730783992125722010-02-18T22:25:00.013-07:002010-03-26T18:02:53.435-06:00I held her tight...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicuBjF46sZ41c3rdmKhsOWVHdS0QZNUaSnDBM8r2r3sh7JMyouexOyqTcTQgzhrVwaWdjJjrm65_iGKwgZMY6bzrPmsYbnRt6HZjPTzsGCnRWMuoyyxyK0JwcnR18h0ikll6V1hKpgZu8/s1600/IMG_1046.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicuBjF46sZ41c3rdmKhsOWVHdS0QZNUaSnDBM8r2r3sh7JMyouexOyqTcTQgzhrVwaWdjJjrm65_iGKwgZMY6bzrPmsYbnRt6HZjPTzsGCnRWMuoyyxyK0JwcnR18h0ikll6V1hKpgZu8/s320/IMG_1046.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
What a crazy past 3 weeks it has been! I have had every intention to blog and I have had so much that I have wanted to share, but literally no time to be able to sit down and write anything down! Kenzlie is now 1 month old and we found out today she has RSV and a really nasty double ear infection! My poor kids get so sick! I am not quite sure how/why but it has been petty crazy- that is for sure! In the last 4 weeks we have been to the doctor 7 times- and that doesn't even include the 5 times my cute mother-in-law took my boys in. They put Kenzlie on medication and we will be back to visit the BEST pediatrician ever- (Dr. Lei) next Friday!! So, wish me luck! My poor sick baby girl- at least Taysen is finally better... for today. :)<br />
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I was able to go to my parents house in Huntsville last weekend and I seriously felt like I was on vacation!! My mom is amazing! She takes such good care of me and my kids. She made Valentine cookies for my kids to decorate and they loved it! My mom is coming down this weekend to hang out with us and we are looking so forward to it! It was so nice to be able to have a change of scenery for a couple of days, and adult conversation so needed. Having Kenzlie so little I don't like to take her out, but my kids have been so sick that I haven't been able to take them out either- well in all reality, I honestly don't dare to try to take ALL of them anywhere- it is crazy enough at home- can you imagine the grocery store?!<br />
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Austin is so funny. The other day he said to me. " I am not sure if you like to be bothered or not when you fall asleep sitting up, or if you would rather me just leave you alone." Okay- I have been super tired... but what do you expect right? I have a newborn. :) Gosh, how lucky am I?! I need to cherish this time I have with Kenzlie, it goes by SO fast! I love having brand new babies- the spirit just radiates from them- it is pretty amazing to be able to just hold them, stare at them, and be able to feel so incredibly close to them. There really isn't anything quite like it.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK7nQUE8PODXDEaZpe5emac1QWH6YFiNuHSgHOy9m2M__Bx68jjj4ySm5zIf0hLmzB5KMxjBxqzFJgK5gVGxzE10l035rH26lrkubFMgfejB5ZM4yYt5gAfrEYpppa36am5StVkFmhhT0/s1600/IMG_0066.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK7nQUE8PODXDEaZpe5emac1QWH6YFiNuHSgHOy9m2M__Bx68jjj4ySm5zIf0hLmzB5KMxjBxqzFJgK5gVGxzE10l035rH26lrkubFMgfejB5ZM4yYt5gAfrEYpppa36am5StVkFmhhT0/s320/IMG_0066.JPG" /></a></div>The day after I came home from the hospital from having Kenzlie, Staley and I were sitting on the couch when he looked over at me, lifted up my blanket, looked at my stomach and said... "Ummm..Mom, you're still kind of pregnant"... okay, what do you say to that!? That isn't all..I like watching the Biggest Loser on Tuesday nights because Austin has meetings, and Staley-well he HATES it! He hates that they take their shirts off to weigh in, he thinks it is disgusting. :) ...Anyway, I was watching The Biggest Loser exactly one week after Kenzlie was born- and Staley asked me-oh so innocently- if I was going to go on that show. When I told him it was for really big people that wanted to lose weight- he just looked at me and said "Well yeah, so are you going to go on there so you can get rid of your belly?" So rude! :) -(but like he knows it's rude) - he didn't believe me when I said my stomach would go away... all I can say is his poor wife! We will definitely have to teach him better manners. :)<br />
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So all 3 of my boys absolutely adore their baby sister. I was really worried about how Taysen would react to her, but he really does love her so much. It is fun to see them with her. I do have to hide her most of the time, so they don't bother her every single second, but she is definitely loved! She is one lucky little girl!<br />
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Austin is so brave! About a week and a half ago I got up with Kenzlie to feed her probably at about 1:30 in the morning or so, and Austin was in the office typing away... when I came in and asked him what in the world he was doing, he looked up at me with tears streaming down his face... and my heart sank. (I am sure he probably doesn't really want me to share this- but oh my gosh, it is just one more reason why I love him so much!) When I asked him what he was doing, he said he couldn't sleep and things kept running through his mind of the week we were in Lake Powell. He knew he needed to write everything down, and there he was at 1:30 in the morning. Maybe one day I will have the strength to tackle that task... but for now, I can only share bits and pieces of my memories... it is too hard- in fact in order to cope, I took everything that happened and placed it in the back of my mind, so I could try to deal with just normal, day to day things....life. To sit down, and write from start to finish- would be a daunting task... Although we were in Lake Powell a total of 7 days (Kamberlie was missing for 4) the memories seem endless....for such a short amount of time, it truly felt like an eternity. As I later read what he had written, tears too, were streaming down my face. I could not stop it, nor did I try to. It was so nice to be able to hear and know his perspective of what happened. I was a bit of a zombie... really. It was like I was in a horrible dream, and yet I knew it was something I could not wake up from. I remember the night before Kamberlie went missing... there she was laying next to me in our bed. I held her tight, and I am so glad that I did! After she was gone I longed for her to be wrapped up in my arms again... I kept waiting for her to run through the doors... but, it never happened. It was so surreal. Day after day, I walked the docks. I would lay on the docks and cry and cry- wishing her back. Gosh I miss her. One distinct memory I have is when my mom and dad convinced me to go with them on a walk to a little store they have on another marina next to the docks we were at... I was holding Stockton, who at the time wasn't quite 2 years old. As we were walking we passed two ladies, who in passing said, "Make sure and hold on to him...somebody's baby just drowned the other day" I looked at my dad and quietly said, "That was my baby." Both my dad and I started to cry... Life is so crazy, and yet it is so good too... It is pretty amazing to look back and now see how far I have come.<div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmCUG_evokQLTrqDOJbidV8Imi_T1qREhKONcHaitURivUdaOd-oT0_Nxos4MAL_4D4qoU2L2DCFCsh28pR4oX8tjo6tLShvpZfx7v90DpFBgSNlZEmmkL4ONssbk5hAWr_4y7rzcGqXo/s1600/picsbysteph+kids+01-07+129.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmCUG_evokQLTrqDOJbidV8Imi_T1qREhKONcHaitURivUdaOd-oT0_Nxos4MAL_4D4qoU2L2DCFCsh28pR4oX8tjo6tLShvpZfx7v90DpFBgSNlZEmmkL4ONssbk5hAWr_4y7rzcGqXo/s320/picsbysteph+kids+01-07+129.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-55093613743562532132010-01-26T18:29:00.009-07:002010-01-29T11:06:15.901-07:00One Week!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQx8fJ_h_YmmvMAS7vWySy1JR_p6ITeuB7RwhsRBddbYGfvWmWe0W7-mJ1KynPNCZ8vSj2rB1dtA3KHbQzewS4_LUXLHoTZuLFliWfaKferhyHo6KTcBN4UxpCpQXxDXPgvwD9vs_huIWC/s1600-h/IMG_0533.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431819321891547378" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 240px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQx8fJ_h_YmmvMAS7vWySy1JR_p6ITeuB7RwhsRBddbYGfvWmWe0W7-mJ1KynPNCZ8vSj2rB1dtA3KHbQzewS4_LUXLHoTZuLFliWfaKferhyHo6KTcBN4UxpCpQXxDXPgvwD9vs_huIWC/s320/IMG_0533.jpg" border="0" /></a> <div><div><div><div>As of today, Kenzlie is one week! Can you believe it? I can't. Time has already gone by so fast... it makes me sad that my kids are growing up so fast and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. :) I can't believe Staley is already 6 years old! I just don't want to let time pass by. I want to be able to soak it all in- if only we could freeze time and enjoy every little thing that makes life so meaningful.<br /><br />Well talk about vacation.... Stockton and Taysen have been gone now for 11 days. It has been really nice being able to spend so much time with Kenzlie, but I miss my boys SO much! Having so much time has made me -Miss OCD- a little stir crazy and has given me LOTS of time to think. It is good though. I can't complain. I have been spoiled rotten!<br /><br /><div></div><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431816646234464194" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 240px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_OOHdbQvTBvPraf3KEHdfsHKMil0SWLViTgkts0eTT1Wr9iycmXZG4tOsFUsnDbt__UPxZCpfgVZScX5UhJDyodMTl2nqOa_J2nrxXXxOe7mQ4JAparn5eMe32GghSC2OYMGFoTLg0Izi/s320/Pictures+Jan+2010+Kenzlie%27s+first+week+211.jpg" border="0" /> <img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431545480249797954" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 240px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhThgkbSACwEqhloYyrhN38P0U1E68IBawZ2EotjXMuhUs_pl-RKzSJ8s2FjPyTcue7582OuujSGnSHwEr6i1Zunut8v_4OtvaFE8Q5Esxgp01h7d6zuLQhzLRtVuJdoXHtM4sEIWSg-HPh/s320/Pictures+Jan+2010+Kenzlie%27s+first+week+208.jpg" border="0" /> <div>Austin gave Kenzlie her first bath, and she loved it! He is so cute with her! I know I said it before, but it is so neat seeing him with her.<br /></div><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5431816651768807890" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 240px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWUuJ7kidMGrdz89PBwmkTHxfpES7CMsFLEqEMUXejYtnIl9lIMjNDqWJSc8m2Ulk-9zi1rg5tKcJWlQzfNKBEliIrarXD0kIzsH84teoR0H0ag3HqMWYyHRP48VrEwKFtY2FAbkzxiqef/s320/IMG_0527.jpg" border="0" /> Staley has been such a great helper! He too, is a bit stir crazy. We are usually a family always on the go. Running here, running there- getting the kids to all their activities, and to just be home all day long is quite an adjustment. It has been good having some really good quality time with Staley. He is a great little boy, and I am so proud that he is mine.<br /><br /><div>So- I know that just having a baby- okay well, being pregnant in general makes me a little emotional. Austin would probably disagree with the "little" part. :) But I am a lot more sensitive to things than normal. Some of you understand- you see a commercial on tv where you can tell this family REALLY loves each other, and you find yourself practically bawling- :) The funny thing is- that family on that commercial isn't even real. Explain that!? Again, not a bad thing. What does that have to do with anything you ask?? There has just been a lot on my mind. </div><br /><br /><div>I realized today while in the shower that I don't remember the last time I cried- in the shower. :) Cried is probably an understatement... more like bawled. And I was so proud of myself! When Kamberlie died, the shower was my "get away" my own time where no one was around and no one could see me or hear me.... it was my time to think and try to deal with things and I would bawl... and bawl... and bawl. For the first year and half this was a daily thing. I wouldn't intentionally go into the shower thinking that would happen- but, without fail it would. It was my little haven where I didn't have to be strong for anyone and I could just let go. As time has gone by my crying episodes have become fewer and fewer- not that they don't happen, but not every single day. Looking back over the past 2+ years I can really see how far I have come, how far my family has come and how much closer we have grown. I know there is still a huge healing process but everyday we get a little bit closer. Why do I write these things? Because I don't want to forget. Because I want to be able to look back and remember how I felt and remember the different emotions I went through. I want to understand just how much I have been blessed and how far I have come. </div><br /><br /><div>I want to write the great memories, the hard memories, and the not so great memories... so I don't ever forget. We are stronger than we think. Our Heavenly Father knew this all along. We just need to figure that out for ourselves. So, with that said- please bear with me, this blog is a way for me to look back and remember the good, the bad and the ugly. :) </div><br /><br /><div>I love you all! Thanks so much for all your support! ...There will be much more to come. </div></div></div></div></div>Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-71135119258686576852010-01-24T17:26:00.004-07:002010-01-24T20:40:38.225-07:00The Bastian Powerhouse<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(255, 255, 255); "><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><i>Wow. What a sacrament meeting. I don't know if everyone was affected like I was but it has been a long time since I was inspired in a sacrament meeting like that. Shame on you Carolyn for even thinking that you couldn't speak! You did awesome! About a year or two ago I asked you if you would say sacrament prayers. You immediately cringed. Your facial expression showed me that you did not want to do it. You said that you have the hardest time getting up in front of people. You finally agreed to say prayers but mentioned that this would have to take the place of speaking in church. I just can't speak in sacrament meeting. I'll get too nervous. I told you that the time would come and that you would do a great job. I really did mean that but I had no idea you would blow everyone away. So shame on you for thinking that you couldn't deliver such a talk. I'm just so glad that you accepted the call from the Lord to speak. The thought came to me during the meeting that how unfortunate it would have been had you declined the opportunity to speak. I got a clear impression of just how many people needed to hear your story & testimony. I was grateful that I was in attendance. You don't really know just how much or how many people you touched today. I am embarrassed to say that I could not keep my eyes dry. The spirit was really strong. I too know what it feels like to submit my will to Heavenly Father’s. Thank you for that story. I could see just how much you and your testimony have grown. What you and Jared said just touched me deeply. I was able to relate and really look within you two and to not only hear but feel what you were talking about. Thank you so much for your testimonies today. I know what it feels like to go & go and then can’t go anymore. I testify that the Lord does indeed send his angles to carry us. This was a pioneer story of many years ago but all of us at one time or another have felt that sacred push or pull. I look at families like the Porters and Heather Mcklinlay who are still pulling the hand cart. When will they arrive? When we can only look at the “now” it can be heart wrenchingly difficult, but as we learn to look past the “now” we begin to see & feel God’s plan for each of us. The gentleman in the handcart company referenced in Sis. Bastian’s talk said “The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay, and I am thankful that I was privileged to come in the Martin Handcart Company.’ ” So the great test for me and each of us is to be able to say that the price that we are paying now or paid was a privilege, and we are thankful to have experienced those trials. It’s so hard to do but remember we are not here to lose character. Sis Bastian said, “Have you ever thought about your trials as being a “price paid to become acquainted with God”? I’m not sure that I had ever thought about it that way before. When we are being tried and we are in pain, emotionally, or physically, the agony that we go through is kind of like a refiner’s fire. The insignificant and the unimportant things in our lives can melt away and our faith can come out brighter and stronger than before. When we go through this “refiner’s fire”, we become like soft clay that our Father in Heaven can now mold and build into Saints that are more faithful, strong, steadfast, and charitable.” Well put Carolyn. So eloquently stated. Thank you. She continued by saying “I was talking to a friend about her daughter-in-law who was struggling to get pregnant. I was empathizing with her and she said, “wouldn’t you have just liked to have been able to glimpse into the future back then and know that ‘hey, don’t stress out, in 7 years you’re going to have three boys of your own’ and then you would’ve handled things differently.” I told her “No”. I learned one of the most valuable lessons of my life through that trial. One that I wouldn’t have learned had I not gone through it or known the outcome. So the real test is how we become more like our Heavenly Father after a trial. Imagine the disappointment of a loving Heavenly Father, after giving us the trial, we become bitter or resentful. It was hard enough for Him to have to see us suffer through it and then to turn our backs on the very God that knew us so well to give us those specific trials to enable us to return to Him. Jared said, “Today, perhaps more than ever before, our faith is challenged on all fronts. We have all witnessed life's tragedies and trials both abroad in the wake of events like the Haiti earthquake as well as within our own ward and even probably within our own families. We've seen that as it's been said, fate rarely calls at the moment of our choosing. The trials of mortality of illness and loss, of financial crisis and unreciprocated love are faced by all of us both young and old, both rich and poor. One of the great mortal challenges we face in enduring the trials is humbly evolving form asking the Lord “why me” to telling Him “thy will be done, Lord.” Well put Jared. Thanks for the insight. Jared referenced this quote. Elder Uchtdorf quoted scripture saying, “It may be hard to see that at times, but hold on a little longer, for “eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him” and wait for Him (1 Corinthians 2:9; see also D&C 76:10; 133:45).” We have been taught since our youth that we need to love Him. Would you not agree? But here that word wait brings on a whole new meaning. What could he have meant when he said wait? Hold on! Endure! Great things are to come! We can’t get so caught up in the “now” that we forget the very reason we are here. Jared referenced this great quote. President Young said of Jesus, “Why should we imagine for one moment that we can be prepared to enter into the kingdom of rest with him and the Father, without passing through similar ordeals?” He’s right. How could we ever have compassion with our own spirit children without experiences hardships? I would like to again thank the Bastians for such marvelous words today. I have truly been edified today. Isn’t it so wonderful how Heavenly Father inspires his children to bless others. Isn’t it so evident how important it is to share our testimonies? Jared & Carolyn could have made up any number of excuses to not speak or could have rushed through their preparations. But no, they heeded the call and performed outstandingly well. Thank you again for sharing the spirit with us today. It’s so great to have people like you in the ward. </i></span></b></span></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><i>Austin Binks</i></span></b></span></span></span></span><span style="line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><i><o:p></o:p></i></span></b></span></span></span></p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span>Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-41638442996339233242010-01-24T12:30:00.009-07:002010-01-24T19:53:31.653-07:00This past week...This past week has been an incredible one! We have now welcomed home our beautiful baby girl, and it is beyond words the feelings I have experienced the past 4 days. Kenzlie is perfect. Beyond perfect. We are so blessed to have her in our family. One of the sweetest things is to see Austin with her. He is so in love with her. To see Austin holding Kenzlie is truly a spiritual experience. They already share this special bond that is hard to even describe. It has been really neat. I am so, so grateful!<br /><br />My boys are sick! Stockton and Taysen have RSV and haven't been able to meet their new little sister. When I heard they were so sick, it broke my heart. As a mom, how could I not be the one taking care of my little boys?! It tore me apart to hear them crying on the other end of the line- while I could do nothing to comfort them. Austin's parents have been so great! They took our kids last Saturday (16th) because we thought for sure this baby was coming early. Little did they know that the boys would get super sick and they would have to keep them until they were well enough to come home. My mom took a couple of days off next week to help out and my parents came down friday night (22nd)to give the Binks a break for a long weekend - taking care of them until Tuesday night (26th), when they get to go back to Austin's parents house again until they are better. Sad! I miss them SO much. Our family is amazing!! Both of our families always step up and help us out so much whenever we are in need. I am so lucky to have such a great family! Thanks you guys so much for all your help! I don't know what we would do without you!<br /><br />Staley too, is so in love with his little sister. He reminds me a lot of Austin. He sits there and holds her and stares at her and talks to her for over an hour. Staley is so cute. He is such a good boy. His little world was shattered when Kamberlie died and he has waited for this moment for a long time. It is very bitter sweet. He is a great big brother and a huge helper for his mom!<br /><br />I don't know what else to say other than I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for this amazing gift. I have been blessed with 5 beautiful and perfect children and an incredible husband- what more could a girl ask for? I am so lucky!Kim Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16147314743647205230noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-85305915486494168932010-01-20T17:49:00.008-07:002010-01-20T20:26:51.093-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5U196d4fK377yUtZTemss7xrWUmGimawbQZEL-Z72g7PYhptGOtdiwLoTZp-NbuYbvGTvrEqrhbMveaaWZcgtt6o1xeOvmjlyc_4J4SEbSVTukprPmBOMFFPadGqzHwSSuhuYsSYfn5A/s1600-h/DSC_3400-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 268px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5U196d4fK377yUtZTemss7xrWUmGimawbQZEL-Z72g7PYhptGOtdiwLoTZp-NbuYbvGTvrEqrhbMveaaWZcgtt6o1xeOvmjlyc_4J4SEbSVTukprPmBOMFFPadGqzHwSSuhuYsSYfn5A/s400/DSC_3400-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429027556130893906" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie7gyd0RN18jtuXqZ8TvPCevICTmpczAKBf64hOg0yrg-GZ-kgfG6KU2gno7GUJ3r7JnflkDqrG5UYWfCjDt06zrdD2nc_iAss9ue51hXK48zsuo8-aMpKse2RCPUCh05aT29nfzQ6RHw/s1600-h/DSC_3397-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; 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cursor:hand;width: 268px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc_W4ItDwuSr8DXoF7bN4vz4lQ8MaxOl7Cx2VJKp0oDdWmO8oNhXjIctGN4LQ9J36WwxIVkt4RfoHzb77Rr8d0I9Klp-MjHS6TzUtZSVD0OBpj-wHlhETju4rKC3TzFjusYoBAYYFtLqo/s400/DSC_3363-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429002862866436546" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZx9QPQ4zyPmtpTOMbp8L6tnwIbkGBedIpKmqfYXR7SAtlGuW7CHR5WoAFa02OYq1CsbimLpTztw2KO1Z0zaJvEFyKery-yMvojISnm8J8XFz1HTvm-P5sixAcG-Ig-hX47BNLtiDpwjo/s1600-h/DSC_3360-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 267px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZx9QPQ4zyPmtpTOMbp8L6tnwIbkGBedIpKmqfYXR7SAtlGuW7CHR5WoAFa02OYq1CsbimLpTztw2KO1Z0zaJvEFyKery-yMvojISnm8J8XFz1HTvm-P5sixAcG-Ig-hX47BNLtiDpwjo/s400/DSC_3360-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429002848933684578" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9I5FZ3h4D8Kqo8PK0DBrTVNzeSPlPlQ53wuYWFdlmPLVd4QT3Efd4JBOAAHkwnAYLN3HYkezBpmdpaLWcTS4IOwiK8SmWT08X6tZ_VufKs4KVfgJJt9xMBnDRBvujC6iFSx0vbEZkOcs/s1600-h/DSC_3359-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 267px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9I5FZ3h4D8Kqo8PK0DBrTVNzeSPlPlQ53wuYWFdlmPLVd4QT3Efd4JBOAAHkwnAYLN3HYkezBpmdpaLWcTS4IOwiK8SmWT08X6tZ_VufKs4KVfgJJt9xMBnDRBvujC6iFSx0vbEZkOcs/s400/DSC_3359-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429002839828082338" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7hcouDI4fOi9Ma3NCYCJKekVb1aX2u76Kj7hgI8IehnVK-goRNnNOZJepWNfqyveKlWqzn-0SpV1PDnjYC38wTXBb5UP03Gqv21l_F4fUbri8VtEWjkayoZ7Vl5vvQ1Yb33pMTZiwH1M/s1600-h/DSC_3357-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7hcouDI4fOi9Ma3NCYCJKekVb1aX2u76Kj7hgI8IehnVK-goRNnNOZJepWNfqyveKlWqzn-0SpV1PDnjYC38wTXBb5UP03Gqv21l_F4fUbri8VtEWjkayoZ7Vl5vvQ1Yb33pMTZiwH1M/s400/DSC_3357-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429002824457695266" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnQipJXemRbnUQi4pgJe7xUfpxjx1Cf3p3K6WG2nsgIP0ukHbjpiqgClzhGrNyhwsltu4dn1fHh6RTwWEz14oGuz0YVALhh3hNPHT3zPYQKrZdySyA4eXTliaS5QJaV3SxXkqh_72UaPI/s1600-h/DSC_3355-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnQipJXemRbnUQi4pgJe7xUfpxjx1Cf3p3K6WG2nsgIP0ukHbjpiqgClzhGrNyhwsltu4dn1fHh6RTwWEz14oGuz0YVALhh3hNPHT3zPYQKrZdySyA4eXTliaS5QJaV3SxXkqh_72UaPI/s400/DSC_3355-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5429002818954773938" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipQ48YwKFSksgrqLZdUroY_3UhxJRmdqNinOUJ38UmgM6SVFTP3IMz059zhcZupB0UvpubtGohcpqOJBIc_9zGk7OdLkQIVp26fOpnqIXjbe3dn9HiEeTCJou9Scv9QPvElPpgM_szE2c/s1600-h/DSC_3351-2-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 267px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipQ48YwKFSksgrqLZdUroY_3UhxJRmdqNinOUJ38UmgM6SVFTP3IMz059zhcZupB0UvpubtGohcpqOJBIc_9zGk7OdLkQIVp26fOpnqIXjbe3dn9HiEeTCJou9Scv9QPvElPpgM_szE2c/s400/DSC_3351-2-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428995168475882530" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtfbvQGBvsTB1-_H9ZtGoXwjqG6gMUIjweuNrjk3EhTMS5UaUNEEP-rZ4YqHuN85EpqNZj9nUN4hwWsxeieDNMtG9eZOOaD9JgViW3_6D_nH3jBamZxe2lc4lphAgZFGc39KQ1pYI4ch0/s1600-h/DSC_3346-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtfbvQGBvsTB1-_H9ZtGoXwjqG6gMUIjweuNrjk3EhTMS5UaUNEEP-rZ4YqHuN85EpqNZj9nUN4hwWsxeieDNMtG9eZOOaD9JgViW3_6D_nH3jBamZxe2lc4lphAgZFGc39KQ1pYI4ch0/s400/DSC_3346-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428995159028973234" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQmEpT-Rc-P60wlmEQrkVI9HQKadCQYQejwmR3GjoxwB_CnsAQMffyMihS8uhFy6D_UzNkKnGlfRVFLSb9JEbkebUZm7RTeXn8uQNgyYKsOskN5kbGlWCPqwEo2lLq2e5knWBhXp7xM0w/s1600-h/DSC_3339-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQmEpT-Rc-P60wlmEQrkVI9HQKadCQYQejwmR3GjoxwB_CnsAQMffyMihS8uhFy6D_UzNkKnGlfRVFLSb9JEbkebUZm7RTeXn8uQNgyYKsOskN5kbGlWCPqwEo2lLq2e5knWBhXp7xM0w/s400/DSC_3339-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428995151311610610" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh63uNHGB5m5G3wC-O0CYJ3YJZDvk-ZoXhBTsRy08zfSWxOa9Lde7_Q00EkYc7otzrfwZYTXbBARTUr15CT3PuGpYuBjKYpsqfILzX1k34wBd2Qt21gfVKLQJNc62WJprd1QBy0nFw11Zw/s1600-h/DSC_3334-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh63uNHGB5m5G3wC-O0CYJ3YJZDvk-ZoXhBTsRy08zfSWxOa9Lde7_Q00EkYc7otzrfwZYTXbBARTUr15CT3PuGpYuBjKYpsqfILzX1k34wBd2Qt21gfVKLQJNc62WJprd1QBy0nFw11Zw/s400/DSC_3334-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428995141153419938" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj21LvxN0mupYrEdc034sCpUJb_N88LOCwcFbynGdC_VWwaSmAP34_ckksvGksgn3jygxKxFXvxrwSKTOGUYTRSyFvBPCR-jyHVbnhe72wg2LgJ4CHXs6MdyM3VU7VWaO-vl3RIizMo5Xk/s1600-h/DSC_3333-2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 267px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj21LvxN0mupYrEdc034sCpUJb_N88LOCwcFbynGdC_VWwaSmAP34_ckksvGksgn3jygxKxFXvxrwSKTOGUYTRSyFvBPCR-jyHVbnhe72wg2LgJ4CHXs6MdyM3VU7VWaO-vl3RIizMo5Xk/s400/DSC_3333-2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428995131058287794" /></a><br />Here are some more pictures. Love her to pieces.Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-9885422145563506322010-01-20T06:41:00.024-07:002010-01-20T08:36:14.677-07:00Kenzlie Binks has made her mark!!!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih7nHKVvbL2VAPn5OLr2lHGubnN_7h3jQIts_hGX7EhM3T9o8TJYF_G8G7T7xxFtbNBoRCeIN7FNEzI7SO8dvE2WKP8oXY0zkyGR2XvCeCae4V_bTPExVnIfGT81Y7VzpkKXwlFBn_Akc/s1600-h/IMG_0196.jpg"><br /></a><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEith0LhwqQFjj7sZKUNX354OnxgbCjbIvdF_9EZDiyueUOIWvBmI2VZLgwz2tdZP_KYcR6LTFhMmMlZjNF9bZa5fnR2kedK6q16E3D03jPYdhFAGQgMq7R4A5tSecLExrbAwCGK05bmV0A/s320/Kenzlie+ZB+Jan+19th+2010+045.jpg" style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428822252769613698" /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;">Well she is finally here. The long wait is over. We are so excited to welcome our little Kenzlie to our family. She was born on January 19th 2010 at 12:06 pm. She weighed 6 pounds 15 ounces. She was 19'' long. Every thing was so perfect. We couldn't have asked for anything to go any smoother. Heavenly Father knows a little bit about tender mercies. Too amazing!!! If there is one person that deserves such a beautiful little girl it's that sexy person in the picture. No not that one. The one below. Look at her. Goodness just radiates from her. Just looking at her you can feel the spirit. She is truly one of God's greatest. If you can't see that then you don't know Kim. She's the best Mom & wife out there. Thanks for all you do babe. I love you way too much. You make me feel like a King. </span></b></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;color:#000099;"><b><br /></b></span> </div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><b><br /></b></span></div><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAXSPqEG4Xac89c7G2xxSegTI1Grh42_XFYvhUSBAGGApXxwi_qTxQ8lDxDGTsxYs0T29df3lC3SSfLpdSQL26kO27N4ZLIV-W1nLeogApWATmwocEXsTkZQ-1XNEAcWstgvVdqS1TVMM/s320/IMG_0122.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428826656820957666" style="text-align: right;float: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px; " /><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: bold; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;">Friday night we thought for sure that we would be going in to have this baby. The contractions started and we were on our way. Well Friday night passed and then came Saturday. This was going to be the day. The contractions were getting stronger. Still no luck. Sunday would have to be the day. So we went out to eat Saturday night to celebrate. This had to be the final meal before she came. Sunday morning came & I was miserable. I did not want her to come yet. I ate something that did not do me well. Many trips to the bathroom to say the least was our Sunday. If she came on Sunday things would not be fun. I was supposed to cater to Kim and she was the one taking care of me. Imagine that! A nine month pregnant wife taking care of me. See what I mean. That's Kim! We got through and made it until Monday. By then we just said we are waiting for tomorrow to welcome her. Anyway Tuesday morning came we got up as if we were getting ready to go on a trip. We showered, cleaned, ate, packed,(More like grabbed the bag since it was packed by Kim two weeks earlier), etc. It did not feel like we were going to have a baby. Needless to say, scheduling to have your baby is the way to go. We get to the hospital, fill out paperwork, no rush, no hurry, no pain, simple & easy. I mean, come on, did you see how Kim looks. Fabulous! Ladies don't do it any other way!</span></span></div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 238); "> </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 238); -webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: underline; "><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih7nHKVvbL2VAPn5OLr2lHGubnN_7h3jQIts_hGX7EhM3T9o8TJYF_G8G7T7xxFtbNBoRCeIN7FNEzI7SO8dvE2WKP8oXY0zkyGR2XvCeCae4V_bTPExVnIfGT81Y7VzpkKXwlFBn_Akc/s320/IMG_0196.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5428827271754797058" style="float: right; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px; " /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>We are still trying to find out who she looks like. It's hard to tell for me who any of my kids look like so it doesn't help that they change so quickly. Dang cute. We are open to suggestions. I'm a little </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>nervous how Taysen is going to act or react I should say. He is so spoiled and now he just won't get the attention that he is used to. So please if Kenzlie has bruises and is banged up please don't turn us into the state. Taysen might just kick the crap out of her. We'll keep an eye or two on her. Yes! Daddy did pick out the bow. Mommy had nothing to do with that. No! I'm not gay or metro. Kim is trying to teach me a little style. Oh and by the way her nick name will be Z (ZEE) or ZB (ZeeBee) or zeebeebeebee (Ken</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>Z</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>lie </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>B</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>inks </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>B</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>a</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>B</b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3333FF;"><b>y) (Beebee) baby with a slight accent. Zibibibi. I'm sure at some point she will grow out of the bi bi part of her nick name. I am just so excited to have another little bibi girl. Before we had any kids I told Kim that I would be fine having all boys. I didn't need the high stress, high maintenance of girls. Oh how I was wrong. Kamberlie just melted my heart. I couldn't imagine life with out her. Now I can't imagine life after with out her. And now I have the privilege of raising another one of God's great daughters. It's humbling and so gratifying all at the same time. I love both of them so much. Kim was falsely accusing me of hogging Kenzlie already. I was sharing! There is always two sides to every story. Mine is the one that is usually correct but who's counting? Words can not describe how I feel. Again, I just need to let everyone know that God is in the drivers seat. HE KNOWS, HE KNOWS, HE KNOWS! That's all there is to it. I wish everyone could see that. Life would make much more sense to so many people. That question of WHY is so uncalled for. To think that we even have the nerve to question God is beyond me and yet we hear and see people doing it everyday. Why did this happen or why does it have to be this way. Maybe instead of a question the statement could be, " I am anxious to see how God shaped and developed me through this experience" or "I can't wait to understand why but am so glad that God knows me and loves me enough to let me struggle through it." Poor picked on me is too often the attitude of people these days. Study the life of Job a little bit and that should put your life into perspective. Study the life of Emma Smith and you might just say, Okay God I'm good with my trials. Because through it all, when we are ready, God turns the trials of life into great miralces of happiness. I am a witness of that. Today is a great day. I feel so blessed. I am so blessed. I love my Heavenly Father so much. </b></span></span></div>Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3891007368259976741.post-42473239474365452592010-01-17T17:22:00.007-07:002010-01-18T07:55:03.176-07:00Clarification...Well, let me just start off by telling you just how much I love my husband. He makes me laugh constantly! He is my hero who unconditionally loves me, protects me, and picks me up when I am broken. I am so glad that he has started adding his thoughts to our blog!! I love reading what he has to say, and I think his words are so powerful! <div><br /></div><div>BUT.... I must confess, I am so embarrassed! Clarification: 1. I do not LOVE shower caps ( and I can't believe he told the world I did ) I just hate getting my hair wet when I am not washing it that day, that's all... girl thing :) (seriously so embarrassing!) 2. Staley is just like his mom AND DAD- it's a good thing, but yes, he has picked up my horrible, pull everything apart that I eat habit, and it is a HUGE pet peave of mine. :)</div><div><br /></div><div>Now that is out of the way.... We have had a funny week this past week. My boys never cease to amaze me with the things they say, and funny things they do. Staley lost 2 teeth this week! He was so excited to put both his teeth and a spacer under his pillow to see what the tooth fairy might bring. Well, to make a long story short... a good 4-5 months or so ago, Staley and I were on our way home from "The Sharing Place" ( a grief group for children who have had a close family member die- and the greatest thing that has helped my boys!!) Anyway, for some random reason we were talking about adoption and I told Staley how someday his dad and I would love to adopt a baby. Well, Staley came home from school the next day telling me how he announced to his whole class how we were adopting a baby- tomorrow!! Needless to say we had to have another conversation about that... :) What does that have to do with Staley losing a tooth you ask? Well, so the day after he put his tooth under his pillow he woke up so excited to see if the tooth fairy left him any money- which she did- and he immediately ran to find his dad and hand him over his money saying, "Here Dad this is so you can buy a baby" not to mention he completely emptied out his piggy bank the night before to help his dad start saving up money to buy a baby.... random!?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Taysen found his nose this week, but more importantly his nostrils which he won't keep his finger out of- he thinks it is the funniest thing. Stockton started using scare tactics on me if he doesn't get absolutely everything he wants, the second he wants it.... "Okay well then I am not going to be in this family anymore if you don't give me.... I am going to go find a new mom..." ???</div><div>I LOVE my boys.. did I ever mention that? I truly love, love, love being a mom, and even though at times our house can be complete chaos, at the end of everyday I am so incredibly grateful for the opportunity Heavenly Father has given Austin and I to be parents. What a magnificent gift!</div><div><br /></div><div>As Austin mentioned in his post, our new baby girl is going to be here by Tuesday! Like a day and a half away!! It is crazy, it is surreal, it is such a blessing and I am so incredibly scared! For baby number 5 you would think it would be no big deal right? Well, I think it is more than that. I think deep down I don't want to fail. I think deep down I want everything to be perfect. I think deep down I don't want to replace- but I want to have a second chance to prove that I can do it and that I can do it right and I can be the best mom that this little girl could ever have... silly you may say? Probably... but truthful. I am so scared that I won't measure up, that I will let her down, that I could do better- and I so need to get over that. I am so excited to have girl things back in the house, to have pink, to have another baby girl! Taysen was such a blessing for our family and came to us right when we needed him here. I think this little girl will too, help us heal. I want her to be her own- I don't want to compare or replace, but enjoy this new little spirit for who she is and for her role Heavenly Father intended her to be in our family!</div><div><br /></div><div>By Kim </div>Austin Binkshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07639620660849415782noreply@blogger.com4