Well, Taysen is sick....again. I took Taysen back to the Dr. on Wed. night and my poor baby is so sick. Taysen is so dang cute. He tries so hard to still be happy even though he is so not. I have been so blessed to have such a good baby. I put him on the scale at the Dr. office, and he is now a whopping 17 lbs! All my other kids were pushing 18 lbs. by the time they were one. My baby Taysen is only 3 1/2 months old! Even though Taysen hasn't felt good, he sure hasn't skipped any feedings. He is just like his mom. :)
The other morning Austin and I were talking about having more kids. (Yes, I want more babies!) I love them all. I told him not to worry one day we will have a little girl. (Don't get me wrong. I absolutely adore my boys! I wouldn't mind having more boys as well.) Staley was in the room working on some little project, and he stopped and looked up at me and said, "We already have a little girl mom, she is just in heaven, but we will see her again- when we get to heaven." It is so plain and seems so easy in his mind. Austin is the same way. The gospel comes so matter of fact to him. It is just so plain and simple. What a great blessing that is to me in my life!
Now Stockton, on the other hand, tries to play me. He is so funny. The other night Austin was gone to meetings and I had put the boys down to bed and Stockton kept getting out. Finally, the last time I told him to get back in bed, and he said, " I can't mom, Kamberlie told me not to." "Really?" I said, "What did she say?" Stockton: "She said- Stockton, don't go to bed." Me: (now smiling to myself) "Whatever, Stockton get in bed." Stockton: "I can't mom, Kamberlie told me not to." Me: "Okay Stock, go get in bed and tell Kamberlie hi for me." :) Needless to say, he finally got in bed. It was just so funny that he thought I would let him stay up if he mentioned her name.
Stockton's latest thing is pretending like he is the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, and I am Belle. Before and after each sentence he will say my pretend name...ex. "Belle..? I love you Belle." I then answer with "I love you too Beast." "Belle...? Do you want a treat Belle?" "No, thanks Beast"... and on... and on....and on. My boys are so funny. I love them so much.
There are so many memories of the last week I had with Kamberlie. My last memory -the very last thing that I remember was looking up at Kamberlie as she was running down the dock. She turned and smiled at me waving....goodbye. It is a sweet memory. A good memory. And if you knew her, it was so Kamberlie. She was beautiful, she still is. Before the divers pulled Kamberlie's body from the water they kept warning us about what she would look like. "Water does strange things to your body" was what they kept telling us. After they had pulled her up and placed her at the back of the houseboat, Austin took it upon himself to protect me (always has) and insisted that he go and see her first, just to make sure that I would be okay. He came back in a few minutes later and told me it was okay, and that I could go and see my little girl. I was so nervous and scared... I remember walking out the back door of the houseboat, getting on my knees and kneeling over her little body. She was so beautiful! Now I was always very proud of Kamberlie and how pretty she was, but I had never seen her so beautiful. She had been down in the water for four days, and yet, she was perfect. More than perfect- it is hard to describe. It was a blessing, an answer to our prayers. She was gorgeous. She looked so angelic, almost like a doll. The spirit was so strong, and I know that she was there with us. That was a feeling that I pray I will never forget... I remember telling the divers I wasn't leaving that dock until we could take our baby girl with us. The hardest thing I had to do was watch them place Kamberlie's little body on a seperate boat , wrapped up in a green flannel blanket, and take her to a car waiting to bring her safely home....
That is my last memory.
As sad as this story is...the whole story...it is still a beautiful story, because she is a beautiful girl!
ReplyDeleteKim. I cannot believe what you went through. You are such a strong woman... full of faith. I dont know how to tell you what your example means to me . I.. have been typing for about 20 in now... and i keep deleting what i type. I just feel your spirit being so strong. I am very sorry for your loss. I know that you will definitely see your princess.
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